I know it's bad for me. Seriously, I know it. No one has to tell me.
I know that it's one reason that I've added back some of my weight. When I was serious about weight-loss, I stopped my soda habit. I won't even tell you how much soda I used to drink, way back in the very heavy days. It's an embarrassing amount, and one that I don't want to remember.
But I've missed that tingly mouth feel, the tickle as it goes up your nose, and how incredibly satisfying an icy cold Coke can be if you are super thirsty. For a long while, I tried to drink diet, and I had convinced myself that it was tolerable.
But I started to notice a pattern, in that, the more diet soda I drank, the worse my migraines were. I stopped drinking diet soda, and I'm down to less than one migraine a week – from a high of three or four.
So, I've picked up a soda habit again. I can justify it as much as I want – I don't smoke, I try to eat healthy, try to exercise five times a week – but I still drink soda.
Earlier this week, my soda habit almost had me convinced that I was clinically insane.
Allow me to explain.
I had bought a soda and brought it home. I took two sips, and my dad called. A few minutes into the call, it occurred to me – I had set the soda down somewhere, and had absolutely no memory of it. Where had I put it? While I continued talking to my dad, I walked all around my downstairs. I searched everywhere. Every room, even rooms that I hadn't remembered going into - they were given the scrutiny as well. I could not find the soda anywhere, and I told my dad twice in the conversation that I thought I was losing my mind.
It made me CRAZY.
Finally, the third time I asked my dad to tell me where I could have possibly put my soda, he started laughing, and he told me to hang up and go find my soda. I am not kidding you when I say that I searched for more than an hour. I don't keep soda in the house (because I have no self control), so if I wanted it, it had to be the one I had already purchased. And I really, desperately, did want to drink that soda.
I asked everyone. I questioned, searched, and really – I felt like I was losing my mind. Who lays a soda down and can't find it?
I never found it. I finally gave up and went to bed. Despondent, desolate, and soda free.
The next day, I went into my small girls room. What should I spy? A nice, cozy reading nook created from a beanbag, a few blankets and several pillows. There were many books there, a reading lamp, and snacks.
And my soda. The very soda that those same children had vehemently denied taking the night before.