It's funny the issues you run into when you become a parent. And even funnier how topics of conversation change when you go from being single, to married, to mommy.
After talking to lots and lots of mommies, both in real life and online, I've found that many of the issues mommies have are one in the same.
A friend of mine from high school has a 2 year old who regularly attends a play group. She said that she never had an issue taking her little boy to the play group until recently, when she noticed that a fellow 2 year old likes to grab her son by his hair, pull him around and pound on his head repeatedly until SHE breaks it up, NOT the bratty kid's mom. Wtf? I'd like to know where the fuck the other mother is when this is happening. Is it laziness? Negligent parenting? Or does the other mother really not care that her child is a brat?
Another friend of mine, online, told me that her sister's 18 month old son likes to pinch her 23 month old daughter. Apparently, he thinks it's hilarious. I guess in this case, her sister DOES scold her son for doing it, but still. If the mother is neglecting to enforce proper discipline, her tactics are going to continue to fail.
My cousin, who has a 2 year old son, said she's constantly battling the terrible twos. Her son likes to punch, kick, hit, bite, smack, pull hair, throw sand, chase her with sharp objects and splash her with bath water. I'm sorry, but if that were my kid, I would NOT laugh it off as "a phase he's going through." No way. My son may only be a year old, but he knows mommy means business when she says "no." I also know that I would not tolerate that kind of naughty behavior and would put a stop to it the moment I noticed it. What frustrates me about my cousin, is that she allows him to run around like a crazy person, wreaking havoc and leaving a mess anywhere he goes. We were at my grandparent's house and he was running around, spitting, smacking, cussing and knocking things over. Any good parent with half a brain would put a stop to that kind of behavior. Did she? Nope. She laughed and said, "he's so bad," and then continued to sip her coffee. Are you fucking kidding me?
I guess that, since becoming a parent, my tolerance for lazy parents has become thinner and thinner. I can't stand it when people let their kids walk all over them, getting away with anything, just because the parent is too lazy or too tired to deal with it...or because they're in denial of their child's behavior.
Has anyone watched recent episodes of Jon and Kate plus 8? I am appalled at the way those kids behave. In one episode, a camera man is helping to set up a projection screen, so the kids can watch movies outside. While Kate was off gallivanting in a corner somewhere, with her pink Blackberry attached to her manicured hand, her kids are pulling at the guy's ponytail, jumping on his back and grabbing expensive camera equipment and running off with it. You'd think she'd make some attempt at actually parenting her kids, but she didn't. Another recent episode showed her kids having complete meltdowns and screaming at each other at the top of their lungs. She kinda shrugs it off and makes a lame ass excuse for the behavior. Oh, okay, kids are gonna be kids, right? Oh hell no. I'll be damned if Franky is going to act like that and get away with it. I don't care how tired I am, my primary obligation and responsibility is as a parent. And a damn good one at that.
People don't realize that they're doing their kids a great disservice by allowing them to get away with murder (well, not murder, but you know what I mean). I know I am coming off as harsh, but it's my blog and I'll bitch if I want to ;-) My younger sister is a prime example of parenting gone lazy. Rather than address a situation and bad behavior, it was ignored and allowed to happen. And now that she's older and has gotten out of control, shoulders are shrugged in denial and disbelief. It frustrates the hell outta me.
I dunno. I guess my point is, if people make the decision to have a child, they should also make the decision to be a parent. Calling yourself a parent is very different from actually being one. Anyone can have a kid, but it takes a special kind of person to be a parent, catch my drift?