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Oh, When You're Up, You're Up

Posted May 17 2012 12:00am

And when you're down, you're down...

In the last 24 hours I've been up and down.

On the down side (because I always believe in starting off on the down side, because then there is NO WHERE TO GO BUT UP!!!):

  • i went to the mall. Two days in a row.
  • To look for shorts. Which is every bit as alarming as one might think given that
  • I have thick and stubby legs and high standards for shorts.
  • By which I mean, they should not cup under my butt. They should not be as long as my kneecaps. They definitely should not taper, making me feel as if I am a sausage stuffed into a casing. They should have no words on the butt. They should look, you know, like shorts.
  • My stainless steel garbage can lid broke off. Which we have fixed thrice, which means I get to buy a new garbage can.
  • Hold me back from the excitement.
  • My lovely and gorgeous necklace , featuring my children's names in a circle, fell off when I was shopping and is totally lost.
  • I realized that I not only double booked myself on Saturday, I quadruple booked myself. That takes a SPECIAL kind of talent.
  • The month of May always kills me, with all of the year end crud crammed in to one month. Graduations, concerts, performances, etc etc etc.
  • It has rained every day this week. The forecast looks exactly.the.same until Sunday evening. The pressure in the air means I've had a headache almost every single day this week. 
  • And I went to the dentist. Where I found out that my spectrum kiddo is going to need a palate expander - her four missing top teeth have been out since Sept - and they haven't come down because there's no ROOM for them to come down.
  • I don't think that there's been a day since 1992 that I haven't been tired. So, so tired - and almost every day, I wake up with a headache. That gets old after a while.
  • I paid the bills. 'Nuff said there.

On the upside:

  • I did, finally, find two pair of shorts that were tolerable.
  • I made a huge pot of yummy bolognese sauce . And delicious granola for breakfast - so the kids can tell me that "there's nothing to eat, Mom!!"
  • I spent two days laying in the food stuffs for the month, so now I don't have to worry about it. 
  • I bought a new oil burner, and so I can smell deliciousness while sitting at my desk instead of the garbage can that is open and uncovered.
  • I spent one of those mall days with my oldest daughter, and we had a very nice time. (If you don't count the time that she asked me to spot her $5 to buy a bathing suit top, and she gave me $16 - to buy a $26 top. Math may or may not be her strong suit.) 
  • My husband bought me a new computer. (I think he was sick to death of me complaining about my computer doing the freeze of death six times a day, but I'm deliriously happy just the same. Thanks be to God for 18 months same as cash!) 
  • I got the funniest product pitch for review today - female fun "private time" items, cleverly disguised as a makeup brush set - so your fun can stay RIGHT IN THE LINE OF PUBLIC VIEW AND NO ONE WILL KNOW WHAT YOU DO WITH THOSE BRUSHES!!
  • Hey, don't judge. It's the little things.

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