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Noone wants to get divorced

Posted Aug 21 2010 7:44am

Are you worried which you might not be able to find ways how to stop a divorce? If you're the average person, you would have tried everything you can imagine in order to keep your relationship and stop it from falling apart.

Unfortunately, if you're also like lots of people, some of the people things you've been doing to try to figure out how to stop a divorce are actually pushing your partner further away.

Here are a few of the things that most people do when they think they learn how to stop a divorce.

1.Reassurance

Most people try hard to tell their partner that they'll change. They reassure them that if they stay in the relationship, things will be different. If you've been pleading with your partner to stay and reassuring him that everything will improve, then you may be pushing him further away.

2.Desperation

Virtually all women trying to stop a divorce tell their partner repeatedly 'I love you'. They want him to see how much they care in the hope that it will make him stay. Trying to make your partner understand how much you love him and how much you need him is almost certain to make him want to pull away. After all, if you keep telling him that you can't live without him and he's on your own who can make you happy, then he's seeing that act of desperation as from a person who no longer has the confidence of the woman he originally fell fond of.

3.Talking or Language

Many women spend endless hours talking, arguing, reasoning, analyzing and trying to fix a failing relationship. This tactic never works. In fact, it simply reinforces to a man that the relationship must be in serious trouble if it requires this much arguing and analyzing, so why keep trying? Nobody wants to be married to someone who constantly wants to focus on the negative aspects of everything that's going on. It's like you need language software to communicate.

While these things are almost normal instinctive behaviors for many women, they don't actually work when it comes to finding ways how to stop a divorce. What works is taking a step back and looking at your relationship a little differently. You need to remove the emotion for just a moment and work on the dynamics of how the two of you connected to start with.

Think about when you first met. You would both have been happy and confident and cheerful. It was just fun to be in each others company. You would have been quite happy to accept your partner for who he was and you would have both made an effort to make sure to compromise on some things so you were both happy. Your partner would have fallen madly in love with you because you made him feel happy when you were together.

So that you can find a real way how to stop a divorce, you need to learn how to get back that happy, confident woman your husband fell crazy about originally. This is different as getting a make-over. Your physical appearance isn't going to change a person's emotions. You will need to stop focusing on the negative aspects of what's going on and work yourself inner happiness. When you're happy and confident on the inside, you suddenly become more like the person your partner loves and respects. That's the woman he enjoys spending time with which will also be the woman he will stop pulling away from.

When you can raise your confidence levels to that point and avoid all the usual triggers that push men away, you will have learned the simplest way of how to stop a divorce.

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