I’ve been talking to you all week in my head. (Bloggers will know what I mean.) I got my CLR - That counts for frugal friday. I should take a pic of Megan - Wordless Wednesday. I sure am grateful for Mike - Thankful Thursday. Oh! Got the filing done- should write another frugal tips post. See? I’m always thinkin’ about YOU. :) Or me. Whichever works. hehe
Do you have one of the following lists? This was suggested when I learned some valuable stuff on goal setting: Make a list of what I need to do today for me, to accomplish my goals. (strong family, sense of who I am, and strong marriage)
For me: So, I’ve been terribly busy at Healing Graphics and Designs. Some of this has been fun (for me) some has been a little too close to “work”. :) I play the piano. And I blog. All this right-brained stuff really is soothing to me. Others knit, or paint, or listen to music. All are very cool options.
For the family: I’m reading “Under Pressure”. Did you know that we’re the first generation to put all of our hopes and dreams as a society on our children? No wonder us Moms are stressed out of our minds! Also for the family, are the small things that I do throughout the day - I stopped and gave hugs to my toddler, and listened to her views on life in general, teddy bear, specifically. (Do boys talk this much at 2?) I stop and listen to the latest assessment of the 8 year old’s classmates. Especially the naughty ones. Every once in a while, I have to follow Emma’s instructions. Mom, I’m ready to take a bow now! Mom! You’re supposed to clap! Okay, now watch me. Wasn’t that GREAT?
For the marriage: No worries, this is G-rated. Hehe. I have one pet peave, that just drives me NUTSO. It is Mike’s way of “cleaning” off a surface: the coffee table, the counter, the sidetable, the desk: any surface. He takes everything on it; ev er y th ing, and places it, all together, in a stack out of site. Do you know where “out of sight” is? In his bedside table basket until it is overflowing, behind the vcr, on top the dryer, in his keys basket, lately it has been in the crevice between the printer stand and the couch. Right there! Right on the floor!
Ticks me right off! I need to take a moment. I’m turning red again.
So, after nearly 12 years of this ahem, difference, I finally thought of a solution! Tried badgering him to death. Er hem. I mean encouraging him. Tried whining, pouting, sulking, yelling, freaking, avoiding, kidding, threatening, bribing. The piles still exist. So, if it bugs ME, why haven’t I looked after the mess? Because in life’s play, where I’m the director and the main character(naturally) the other players do what i want. He was supposed to deal with the paper the way I desired.
So, guess what I did? I filed all the stuff. I got an entire giant black garbage bag full of papers to toss, and one box of paper to store (2006 stuff), and 2007 and 2008 is filed away. I even busted the paper shredder in the midst of this(I confess, I’m kinda proud of that. lol). Ta da!!! All clean. I’m as happy as a clam! No fuss, no muss. no piles!
Probably the most important of all these goals, is ME. I admit it, this IS self-centered. I’m not going to lie to you, and say it isn’t. We are the first generation to be all about “self-care”. But in previous generations children didn’t require a mother to sacrifice herself, and to do that with no help from family either. Sure we have friends, but they’ve sacrificed their sanity on the alter of their children too, so they’re not able to offer much warmth and love. Moms used to strap the infant on her back, and go about her business, keeping a home, or crafting products to sell, or working on the farm, whatever. When they could walk, they toddled along behind Mom learned from what she did, observing, and joyfully helping when they could. the industrial revolution changed all of this, we are a society of growing populations, complex needs, which necessitates higher education, and we need our children to be prepared for this fast paced life, being able to sort through a deluge of stimulation. I have to say I’m sure glad I wasn’t born generations ago, working in a factory, or on a farm, unable to vote or have value on par with a man’s.
Anyhow, I digress. What IS important, is that you know, that children do NOT have to be our “lives”. They require a lot of us, yes. We love them to death, of course we do! They’re so cute. And little. And vulnerable. But OUR lives, as women, as wives, as members in society, continues. Not just when they are out of high school but right now.
I believe raising children is a God-ordained calling. “the least of these” right? But I also think that we are called to do so much more than that. We are each unique, called by God to live purposeful and meaningful lives. We are to love our neighbours too, not just our children, ya know? When I loose sight of my own purpose and meaningfulness, I begin to get resentful, and tired. And so do a lot of other moms( source).
I hope that you find yourself enjoying your purpose and meaning in life. I hope that you are solidly YOU.