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Interview with the experts - the 2010 edition about babies

Posted Jan 07 2010 7:30am
A couple weeks ago, Cole asked me, "What do babies do in their mom's belly all day?" Immediately, I saw this as an awesome opportunity for another "interview with the experts" post.

Here's the 2010 edition about BABIES...everything you ever wanted to know (or maybe, didn't want to know).

Where were you before you existed?
Cole - At the doctors office waiting for you to come in for your appointment (oooh, this is creepily wierd considering they are IVF babies....I was tempted to say, "Actually, you were in a petri dish in a lab, waiting for me to come in for my appointment")
Bella - I was in the sky flying around trying to find where you lived.

What do babies do in their mom's bellies all day long?
Cole - I'm not sure but I think they probably sleep most of the time. When they're not sleeping, I think they sit around drawing pictures.
Bella - No, they don't because they don't have paper to draw on. They just lay there and play with their toys.

What do pregnant moms do all day long?
- Check their baby's heartbeat and eat chicken nuggets
Bella - They drink lemonade and eat chicken wings. Sometimes they sing songs to the baby through the belly button. That's why I like Hannah Montana because that's what you sang to me all day long when I was in your belly.
Me - No, I didn't.
Bella - You didn't? Well, you should have.

What do the dads do all day long?
Cole - Probably nothing
Bella - They sleep late and bring the mom lemonade and chicken wings

How long should a baby stay in his/her mom's belly?
- One week
Bella - One, maybe 33 minutes. Yeah, 33 minutes.

What do babies look like when they're born?
Cole - They have oval heads and they're really small, like a worm. The skin is the color of my arm
Bella - They have no hair and they have pink skin. Some have teeth.

What's the first thought that the parents have when they see their new baby?
Cole - They probably cry because the baby has an oval head
Bella - I think they're happy and excited until they find out the baby is a pig
Me - You mean, a pig as in hungry all the time?
Bella - No, I mean a real pig.

What's the first thing a baby wants to eat after he's born?
Cole - a big, ole banana with no brown spots on it
Bella - waffles and pancakes from IHOP

What does a baby want to do after he's born?
- learn to steer a car and play the Wii
Bella - I don't know, probably poop in his diaper

Before babies can talk, all they can do is cry. What do you think they're saying when they cry?
Cole - I want cereal and I want to be a super baby
Bella - They want someone to change their poopy diaper and give them a waffle.

Which parent should be responsible for diaper changes?
Cole - the mom
Bella - the dad

What should every new parent know about having a baby?
- That it hurts your belly, especially if the doctor has to use a knife to cut the baby out. And that the baby will probably smell bad sometimes unless you give it a bath 20 times a day.
Bella - There's a whole lotta puke and poop. They cry a lot and get on your nerves. That's why I'm NEVER having babies. Registered & Protected
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