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I Delivered the Baby; You Deliver the Bauble

Posted Aug 25 2008 3:36pm
A recent article in The New York Times (reprinted in my local newspaper) presented the concept of a “push present,” as in, “Honey, I just pushed out this big ole baby, so it’s time for you to deliver a giant diamond for my finger.” A BabyCenter survey found that 55 percent of pregnant mothers were pushing for a “baby bauble.” I knew a woman like this. She spent a lot of her pregnancy wondering how her husband was going to reward her for her months of pain and suffering.

While I’m all for being the recipient of appreciation, and I don’t deny that pregnancy is no picnic in the park, I can’t help but be a little nauseated by this concept, certainly equivalent to the morning sickness I felt for three months during each of my pregnancies. Yes, women do get the tough end of the bargain when it comes to creating a child. I know what I’m talking about as my stretch marks and droopy boobs are definitely more noticeable than my husband’s. I endured hours of contractions and the greatest pain of my life to bring our babies into the world. So, sure, at times I was tempted to shout “Not fair!” to my husband (as if he had control over the situation).

But, on the other hand, he never got to feel the fluttering of human life inside him, the pride of being able to grow a baby from a little egg, and the attention that only pregnant mothers-to-be receive. He missed out on the morning sickness and swollen ankles, but he also lost out on the joyous wonders of being pregnant. Call me weird, but I’ve always loved being knocked up!

The way I see it, maybe I should give my husband a gift for helping me to be a mother and experience pregnancy. But, hey, I did give him a gift—our twins—so I consider us even. However, if ever he did get the urge to get me a reward for the sacrifices I made, he can forget about the new ring. A cleaning service or household chef would suit me much better!

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