A baby’s first language is cry. That is a God-given gift. That was the only way a baby can communicate his pain or discomfort.
Yet, when a parent rushes to him WHENEVER he went ‘wiaahh‘ a little, the baby is smart enough to know that crying has become a weapon.
The baby grows to a toddler and the weapon becomes even more powerful. From a tearless cry, the toddler has now ‘trained‘ his tear-glands to secrete liquid whenever he wants something; or worse, DEMANDS for something which he knows is forbidden.
Once the parent gives in once, there will be a second time and a third and the ‘cry-weapon‘ becomes DANGEROUS.
A parent, who is so used to giving in to the whims and fancies of the toddler, has become the victim of the ‘crying torturer’. Almost to the extend of so-long-as-you-could-stop-crying-I’ll-do-what-you-want.
Why did I say the ‘cry-weapon’ becomes Dangerous as the child grows? ‘Cos whoever made him cry, he would point at the person and the parent will SCOLD or PUNISH or HIT the new victim.
Over time, so long as the cry-master starts showing off his crying-kungfu, the parent, without even checking out the reason for the tears would start to ’shoot fire’ at the nearest person standing beside the crying child.
OVER THE YEARS, I had witnessed. So many times I had kept my mouth shut because no parent likes someone else, no matter who that person is, to scold his child.
But Today, enough is enough, no one ever let this little cry tyrant know that crying is a gift and NOT something to be abused, or worse, to be used against someone whom he does not like.
I raised my voice at him. He was shocked! For the very first time, he was the one being scolded when he is still sniffing up his mucus with his finger pointing at the poor victim.
He sat down, with his eyes wide on me. Volume went down too. I walked out of the room after giving him his first lecture. Did not even want to look at the parent’s face, ‘cos it would definitely be unpleasant.
I may have done wrong to scold him…. but my ‘little test’ has proven that this little tyrant can be subdued, if only the adults BOTHER to do it!
***I did something extraordinary today because this little tyrant’s ‘potential victimS ‘were having a wonderful quiet time playing together. I do NOT want him to spoil what is so blissful and rare.
Then again, to some, especially to the parent, this might not be an excuse to raise my voice on his child.….