When it comes to improvement everyone will tell you to always go forward, never backward. So how come I sit here in the exact same position I was January 2009? I am here in NH while my husband is away working and trying to find us a place to live. It is like a terrible groundhog day movie.
It feel like we haven't moved forward at all, but backward in life. Of course I feel lonely here in NH without him, but I really feel bad for my kids. It takes a toll on them with him away so often. Especially baby K whose favorite person in the world is Daddy. Really, he could care less about me, he wants to be by Daddy every minute of the day, he is who he asks for the minute he wakes up and the person he wants to put him to bed. Daddy hung the Moon and the rest of us are just props in the sky.
This is the time when I get stressed out with regular life trying to be everything to everyone in this house without anyone to complain to at night. I have been here before, last year I stayed with the kids for 6 months while E was away. It is hard to stay positive when I know exactly what is coming my way, but hey, at least this time I know what I am up against.