I have two good stories for you. But first – I am wearing an ice pack on one hand. How do you wear an ice pack, you ask? First, you get a long piece of masking tape. Then You get a small-ish ice pack in a baggie. Then you wrap said tape around baggie to hold it in place. Smart, I tell ya.
Emma came home this week so excited about Fun Science Friday in her grade one classroom. She learned how to waft air from above a beaker into her face to sniff it. As opposed to burning all the hairs in your nostrils by taking a good wiff of vinegar, like some not-so-smart people might have done. Maybe. And yesterday the pretend play in the car was hilarious – she was very intense on discussing the ‘subject’ and observing the ‘subject’. And then she demanded that Megan discover the ‘subject’. The ‘subject’ was a poor teddy bear. But thats beside the point. So like any good mother would do, I was simply being a good example and wafting the steam from the kettle to my – er – something. Before I yelped loudly “ow!” and jumped. The girls were stunned. So apparently when I say I regularly ‘yell’ what I should say is that I more like ‘talk loudly’. Because this? this was YELLING. The subject? steam from boiling water. The discovery? It burns like the dickens. So I’m typing with what looks like a blue turtle shell strapped to my right hand with masking tape.
My second story. Because a girl can’t just have bad luck. It really must come in strings of bad fortune. I was doing my toes. It had been at least a century and there were pick axes involved. You know what I mean? So I’m doing my toes. And I know a secret that I’ll share with y’all. Vaseline – the petroleum jelly stuff – makes a great cuticle and skin softener. My esthetician shared this with me. Anyhow, I placed it all over my toe cuticles. Then I was really liking how it wasn’t melting too fast, so I started in on my heals and and pads of my feet. And then, it occurred to me that it was really smelling quite minty in my bedroom. (Yeah, I do my feet on the bed – its hubby’s favorite thing.) And by minty – I mean reaaaally minty which is surprising because I was only using unscented lotion and vaseline. Briefly I wondered if the kids were up to something – nope, sleeping. I looked around for a second. Can you smell Mint when you’re having a stroke? Nope, thats rotten eggs or something. Then I checked the bottle. In the bottle that is now all over my feet? Vicks Vapour Rub. So when you’re in a pinch, not only does Vicks vapour rub melt less quickly than vaseline it also smells really nice. :)
Now, I’m going to call my hubby because I’m sure – absolutely positive – that a burned hand precludes me from being the supper-maker. And possibly from cooking again until Monday.
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