We’re two days status-post the biggest orgy of wrapping paper and hyperglycemia known to mankind. Despite the fact I was tasked with working Christmas Day, my child — now 18 months old — had no less than five present-opening sessions. The image above is merely one such session — Santa’s work. Rumor has it it took him over 4 hours, dozens of curse words, a bit of jimmy-rigging, and eight entire liters of elbow grease to get that play kitchen into place.
Anyways, due to sessions at multiple houses and the fact my son is the sole grandchild on both sides, my child is in possession of enough phat loot to put even KB Toys back in business. I seriously don’t know what we’re going to do with it all. Our living room is coated in various plastic and wooden toy parts as of this morning. Compounding that, we’re moving to a smaller home come March.