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Nothing worthwhile to say

Posted Oct 01 2008 8:07pm
There. Now that I've gotten that out of the way, I can go on with the unworthwhile stuff. Seems there's a general ennui out there in blogland - whether it amounts to spring fever, or what, I dunno. Or maybe it's the bony fingers of depression closing round my neck, as they seem to do from time to time - I suppose I'm about due. The stagnation that normally marks my pre-coffee morning seems to occupy more and more of each day, and I hate that because I do not structure my life to have such dawdly inertia take over. A lot of my friends, though, have been in similar places lately.
I know the answer, though - I need to get running again. When I'm running, the white noise quiets down and I'm enough. I've run once in 4 months. And while I've been sufficiently busy that I still look like my usual skinny-ass self on the outside, I feel flabby and soft and lazy, and I know that can't be helping my attitude.
It's when I feel like this, at the low point, that I start to think of all the things I want to do and just don't do... all the things that should matter to me more than I can make them... and how I wonder if there's a way out from under the mediocrity that characterizes my adult life?

The purpose of this is not to come across as despondent. Much the opposite. Just a momentary catharsis. A few things going on in my life I'm excited about, the most important of which is too personal to blog about but energizing on many levels. Other stuff, though, I finally get to dive back into being Charge Nurse at work - after a brief re-orientation period since my computer-aided hiatus from that detail. I really love to be in charge - something empowering about being the person running the 6th busiest ER in the country, and feeling like you do it reasonably well...

We're in the process of resurrecting a tiny writers' group I've been part of for 8 or 9 months or something - which is a wonderful avenue for me to push myself to write and to get honest critique from a few other writers I respect. I need a little external motivation to force myself to carve time out of other aspects of my life to nurture my writer's spirit (and finally get cracking on the revision/second draft of my novel).

And I've volunteered to be a co-captain of the ER Team for the American Heart Association Heart Walk (another cause I believe wholeheartedly (hee hee) in ever since the fall of 04 when my dad, sans warning or appropriate cardiac history, had a heart attack and arrested - thankfully he had the good sense to do it in a hospital lobby, so he's alive and well).
I'll close this post up for now, since it's just a rambler anyway...Thanks for listening!
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