Here I sit. Belly full of fondue (mmmmmm...) from a one-day-belated birthday dinner with the goofball above. Hair a bit tangly and road-fume-smelling from having ridden to said dinner on a very sexy Harley. A little sleepy. Content, largely. Annoyed with one source of constant irritation, like that one fly you can't kill but that keeps buzzing around your ear just to piss you off. But largely content. There's coffee brewed - a couple of good movies rented - and a whole night to be a slug. Today was much the same - the park and the pool with the 2/5 of the collective kid gaggle that didn't have school. Beautiful on the front range and hopefully will be more of the same for the weekend and Monday.
Been thinking about a lot of things lately. Not contemplating diving into these things, mind you, but thinking about them. Like organized religion. A good friend of mine has completely transformed himself in the past couple of months - owing a good deal of that peace to a new love that seems to be feeding him what he's been lacking for so long - but he said to me the other day, with a quizzical and almost frightened facial expression, "I've found God??" Shook me a little, you gotta know the guy this is coming from. And then Scott and I have had some discussions in the past few days too, on those same lines, and I think I've finally become confident of that safety zone for conversation, gloves off, gonna say exactly what I think because I know you'll still love me even if you don't like what I say. And that opens up all kinds of interesting avenues for discussion, I think - and it's big for me to not have to give a rote 3-word answer for my stance on religion. That was the first thing that struck me about conversations with Scott - how easily they flowed and how open I felt able to be. Anyhoo.
My shrink continues to provide all kinds of interesting insights. This time on kids and behavior and so forth. A gem: If a child is not allowed or encouraged to express fear and anxiety in their own way on their own time, they will learn to act it out when no one is looking. And adults who have grown out of a childhood where they weren't allowed to express fear and anxiety, act out their fears and anxieties in the form of snap decisions, hasty and emotional and later-regretted judgments, all that rash crap that gets people into trouble with relationships. God. I'm glad I had such stable, grounded parents.
All right, blogosphere. You've had enough of my drivel for the night. I think it's time for some coffee and maybe some popcorn. And a lot of snuggling. Be jealous.