I went back to work this past Sunday night, something I was dreading. I got used to being home with the kids and although I was going stir crazy being at home, I didn't want to go back to work. I'm not sure why but going back to work after maternity leave got harder with each kid. But, anyway, I went back to work Sunday night, only did an 8 hour shift, and had just a few tears as I left. Thank goodness it was a slow night. We actually had plenty of labor nurses (which is surprising) so I was only going to have 1 patient, the midnight induction. So I had about an hour to get ready, try to remember my passwords to everything. Thankfully, I was able to log into the 2 charting systems we use, one for the fetal monitor and the one for meds. But I couldn't log into my email or into the Omnicell, the machine that dispenses medications. And it wasn't because I forgot my password. Apparently they had disabled my user id and of course, being a Sunday night, no one was there to fix it. It was fabulous. The charge nurse was able to give me a temporary id and password so I could function, but it was a pain in the arse. It becomes almost mindless when you log into different things so when you have to change a password or, in my case, have some funky user id, it slows you down. As for my work email, the guy in IS who can usually fix anything with the computer couldn't figure out what the problem was with my email. So who knows when that will be fixed. Beyond the technical difficulties, the night wasn't too bad. The midnight induction was a no show, but I did admit one patient. Like I said, it was a slow night. I felt just "off" going through the millions of questions we ask when someone comes in. I had no problems with the assessment/hands on stuff, like the IV, cervical exam, reading the monitor, but it was more in my organization, my routine. It's a bit hard to explain, but I just felt like I had been gone for 10 weeks. Monday night was much better. I felt like I was back to my old self, well, maybe 95% back to normal. I think this weekend I'll feel "back".
Caleb did just fine with my return to work, sleeping through the night for the first time Sunday night and again on Monday. Lucky Husband. Of course last night, since Mommy was home, Caleb was up quite a bit. Figures, right? A friend of mine, who has 5 kids, calls it survival mode. They know Mom isn't there so they figure they might as well sleep.
On a completely different note, I want to take just a minute to remember my stillborn niece Mirabel. She would have been 7 years old today. My SIL and BIL have been actively trying to conceive for the past year without success. I finally talked her into making an appointment to see her physician. Today I pray they are able to conceive again soon. My thoughts are with them today as they remember...she may be gone, but not forgotten.