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Learning to Relinquish Control

Posted Nov 13 2007 6:35pm 1 Comment
It's now an accepted truism: when you resist what life offers you, good or bad, it can lead to some serious mental, spiritual, and even physical blockages. I have learned that the key to happiness lies in relinquishing control over life. This means taking responsibility for the things we can change, as the old saying goes, but also being able to recognize that there are many things we don't have control over. When we learn to trust ourselves, it becomes easier and easier to let go of the vise-like grip we have on life. We can live more spontaneously, enjoy the moment, and flow effortlessly with our lives rather than struggling against the current. To sum it up, I call this attitude "saying yes to life." This means no matter what happens, we can see the positive aspects in all our life circumstances. We no longer have to struggle. We can have faith in the fact that whatever comes along, we can handle it.
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If you've been to my website you'll see that I am quite critical of "The Secret," even though I am all into California woo-woo stuff. I have learned (often the hard way) that forcing an outcome is often just a recipe for pain. Also, when you get too attached to having things a certain way, you are blocking yourself from receiving something else that might even be better for you. I think the easy example for this is in relationships, where we cling to a partner or ex who is obviously not only wrong but possibly even harmful to us (emotionally). We think we must have them or never experience happiness and love again. Yet, if we would just let go, we might find out that our soul mate is the friend who has been sitting there right in front of our faces the entire time. Who knows what life wants to give you. Relax and just let it in.
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