We even have a use of force commission!
I was trying to change out my windshield wiper the other day and was struggling to put it on the arm the correct way. I was getting frustrated because it looked easy from the other wiper but every time I tried to put it on it didn’t look right! I really wanted to just force it, but I knew from costly experience not to do that. I finally thought I had it and drove off. A couple minutes later the thing was flapping around so I jumped out, suppressed an urge to scream and methodically figured out how to put the thing on correctly – without force.
Have you had a similar experience? That incident got me observing where else in my life I use force. I noticed I brush my teeth with too much force, I grab a towel from the shower with too much force, I even walk with too much force. Whew, I am one pushy babe!
In addition to feeling how much force I do in everything I also noticed how it affects my attitude. If I clench my jaw I feel uptight and a bit angry. If I shake a strangers hand I tighten my grip if theirs is tight and it feels like a challenge. If someone slaps me on the back I brace and want to slap them back even harder. If a person gets in my space I stiffen, jut my jaw out and push back without actually touching them.
I purposely, consciously stopped doing all the reactions that didn’t feel good. If the handshake is super firm I yield my hand, different than going limp. If someone is in my space I just stay where I am without stiffening but yielding my body. The funny thing is when I yield my body they immediately step back. If I get the backslap I put my hand on their shoulder or back in a connected way, firm but without force. I seldom clench my jaw, even when doing something physically hard or concentrating intensely. I walk feeling like I am on a carpet two inches off the ground yielding my body to the changing contours.
My attitude and disposition are much sunnier and light these days. I don’t have mood swings like I used to and my mouth that used to be in a permanent downturn is mostly upturned. Oh, and the released jaw seems to have an effect on my lips, they are getting positively plump!
May force NOT be with you!
We even have a use of force commission!
I was trying to change out my windshield wiper the other day and was struggling to put it on the arm the correct way. I was getting frustrated because it looked easy from the other wiper but every time I tried to put it on it didn’t look right! I really wanted to just force it, but I knew from costly experience not to do that. I finally thought I had it and drove off. A couple minutes later the thing was flapping around so I jumped out, suppressed an urge to scream and methodically figured out how to put the thing on correctly – without force.
Have you had a similar experience? That incident got me observing where else in my life I use force. I noticed I brush my teeth with too much force, I grab a towel from the shower with too much force, I even walk with too much force. Whew, I am one pushy babe!
In addition to feeling how much force I do in everything I also noticed how it affects my attitude. If I clench my jaw I feel uptight and a bit angry. If I shake a strangers hand I tighten my grip if theirs is tight and it feels like a challenge. If someone slaps me on the back I brace and want to slap them back even harder. If a person gets in my space I stiffen, jut my jaw out and push back without actually touching them.
My attitude and disposition are much sunnier and light these days. I don’t have mood swings like I used to and my mouth that used to be in a permanent downturn is mostly upturned. Oh, and the released jaw seems to have an effect on my lips, they are getting positively plump!
May force NOT be with you!