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When you cant do a Mood Map

Posted Nov 21 2009 10:01pm
What do you do when you wake up in the morning and you can't even do a Mood Map?

If you are someone who is highly motivated and who does the impossible, what do you do when you can't even manage a Mood Map? What is going on? Should you make yourself Mood Map, are you being lazy, or should you go back and hide under the Duvet?

What do you already know?
1 - You are not lazy - you bought the book, you are reading it and doing the Mood Maps - you are not lazy! 90% of book owners never read their books. You are not lazy.
2 - It is far more likely you do too much. Doing is how you express yourself, and not being able to "Do" means you can't be you and that adds your misery

The Chapter on Moods and Personality is probably the worst in the book. Not because I don't know what I mean, but because I find it hard to explain what I mean. The next book will hopefully put that right. Nonetheless, understanding your personality type helps you discover how to manage your moods better. Your personality type reflects how you are when you are at your best, happiest and most fulfilled.

If you are a "Doer", you need to "Do" things to feel good about yourself, you are used to working through your problems. "Doing" makes you feel good.

On the other hand if you are a natural "Being", you have to feel right before you start. You are at your best when you are watching, curious, leading a gentle life and seeing how the world is meant to be. Then when you feel right, you can do whatever you want.

If you are a "Doer" you are not lazy! At least you are not naturally lazy, although you know you can fall into bad habits, because if you could do stuff, you would be out there doing it, not needing to read a book about "Doing"

(For the record, if you are "Being" you are also not lazy, because lazy people don't read Mood Mapping)

So what has happened? What has happened to the human dynamo you were a couple of years ago?

Should you make yourself do more, or accept that today, and maybe tomorrow and even the next day or possibly the rest of the week, you are going to have "Me time"

No one can keep going, week after week, year after year without paying a price for it. There are limits to how much any one person can do. Each of us has a "Capacity for Work" and if you keep doing more than you are physically or mentally able to do, year after year, you will get ill, with minor infections, exhaustion and then more major illnesses.

If you have reached the point where you cannot easily do a Mood Map, you are almost certainly exhausted. If you are exhausted, you need to rest and you need to sort out the problems that have led you to being exhausted

The cause of your exhaustion, may or may not be your job. But if you love your job and it fulfills you, offers you opportunities that you have never had before and even pays you for letting you do something you love, the chances are the problem is not your job, even if it looks to the rest of the world as though it is hard work and highly stressful.

Have you done the exercise on Day 5 and see where the major problems are. If it is not your job, maybe it is your relationships? All too often, especially people who are "Talker Doers" run into problems with relationships. They know everyone, everyone loves them, they have lots of friends but deep inside they are lonely, they are looking for that special person, who makes you feel special and stand out from the crowd.

There is no simple answer - it has taken you years to reach this point, you are not going to put that right overnight

Here are one or two things you can do immediately

Make a Stop list - give yourself chance to draw breath
Yes Hide under the Duvet for a couple of days, and then reassess
Start Omega 3 essential fatty acids - fish oils or flaxseed oil

Most of all look after you and pamper yourself until you get some energy back. Anyone who has gone out, bought a book, is reading that book and doing the exercises, is not lazy! In one sentence

Take the day off, watch a movie or even just hide under the Duvet for a couple of days - its OK, the world will not come to an end because you look after yourself

If you carry on, when every bone and every cell in your body is crying stop - you will damage yourself. Don't take medication, don't flog a dead horse! or least a tired one, just give yourself the break you need.

If it lying on the beach or hiding under the duvet gets to be a habit and after a few days you still don't feel better, come back for some more suggestions - email me, or add a comment. In the meantime, do the simple things and have some fun!

Copyright (c) Dr. Liz Miller
Mood Mapping
Dr Liz Miller
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