I am very glad that I was able to be at my parents house when my mother had her surgery. I feel blessed that I have been able to do a few things for her. When I had originally made plans to be here at this time, she kept saying that she did not think she would need very much help. Her surgery was rather minor and the literature about it said that she would be able to resume normal activities right after the surgery. The literature was not quite accurate – at least in my mother’s case.
When she first got home after the procedure, obviously she was really wiped out and tired from the sedation the doctor had administered. She feel asleep almost as soon as we got her settled in a chair. When she did wake up, she was more alert – sort of – and felt like walking. She did very slow circles around the house. I say slow circles because as she was using her walker and slowing making her way through the house, she kept falling asleep. There was even snoring. I followed her around, because I was afraid that she would fall over backwards while she was sleeping.
She has needed more help with little things than she anticipated. I have been able to fix supper for all of us, and do some extra clean up around the house – in anticipation of my daughter – in – law’s arrival. My mother has to wear something called compression hose on her legs. The leg she had operated on has to stay in a compression stocking 24 hours a day – except when she takes a shower. Because of how tightly they fit, they are extremely difficult to get off and on. There have been a few times when she has needed some help with them.
My mother has appreciated the extra help I have been able to give her, and I have enjoyed being able to do things for her. She has done so much for me in the last year or so that it is nice that I have the opportunity and am capable of giving back to her. As silly as it sounds, it made me feel good to be able to help her with something as little as her compression hose. It reminded me of one of those intimate, caring and bonding moments you so often read about in books. One of the things I have noticed, is that helping my mother out has taken my mind off of my own stuff. It has been really nice concentrating on someone else’s needs. In many ways, it has been the best mental health medicine I have had. Doing things for other people really does a lot to make you feel good about yourself. There is a sense of pride in knowing that you helped make someone’s life a little easier.
She will have her other leg operated on sometime after the first of the year. At least we now have a better idea of what her needs are going to be then. I plan on being around then as well. In fact I am looking forward to being able to help her out again.