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Narcissists Sabotage Couples Therapy

Posted Jan 27 2010 11:39pm

In a desperate effort to save her/his marriage some non-narcissistic partners turn to couples therapy. The narcissist enters therapy with no intention of cooperation. In some instance he or she is able to manipulate the therapist into taking his side. This leaves the psychologically injured spouse in a state of confusion and emotional isolation.

Couples therapy is not effective with narcissists. These individuals know for certain that they are superior and perfect. All of the problems in the marriage have been caused by the partner, not them. In some instances if the narcissist enters couples therapy he or she is able to manipulate the therapist into siding with him, leaving the abused partner in a state of confusion and emotional isolation.

I suggest that the non-narcissistic spouse enter one on one psychotherapy (if they make the decision to participate in therapy) with a highly skilled clinician who is highly informed on the nature of the narcissistic personality disorder. The strong therapeutic alliance that is formed provides the client with insight, a working through of psychological conflicts and a strong source of support for making the decision of whether to remain in the marriage or to divorce.

To learn more about the true nature of the narcissistic personality, their psychodynamics, their exploitive games and how to deal with them successfully, visit my website:


Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.

Telephone Consultation


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