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How do you deal with a husband who has a long history of being extremely moody? His moods often seemingly come from nowhere.

Posted by coping

Stress definately contributes to his moodiness.  He most often takes it out on me, but also on other family members if they happen to be around. His facial expressions show his mood.  He doesn't become violent, but raises his voice a great deal and is extremely self deffinsive.  He tries to compensate for it by being very nice to me and doesn't understand that it doesn't excuse the disrespect I get and the embarrasment I feel when he does me this way, especially in public.

Answers (2)
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It is important for you to take care of yourself. One very helpful possibility is to obtain counseling/therapy for yourself. If your husband is seeing someone, you could possibly see that professional or obtain a referral. Best of luck to you.

Sounds exactly like what my sister-in-law has been dealing with.  I love my brother, but his moodiness and anger are getting very much out of control.  I know why he is this way, but that won't help you in your case... so - what I can tell you (from my years of therapy and since I've been recently discussing this same issue with my own therapist) is that anger/moodiness one of the number one signs of depression in men.  Just because he's not physically abusive, this type of behavior is just as destructive. 

Like Clueless C. mentioned, it's very important for you to take care of yourself.  Studies have shown that the feelings of depression are contagious.  A good first step would be for you to see a counselor (just as Clueless C. suggested).  

Men have a harder time admitting they have an issue and often spend too much time in denial instead of getting the help they need.  

I think after seeing a therapist you'll be armed with the tools you need in order to approach the situation in the best possible way.

Hang in there and don't forget to take care of YOU first!


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