So many mental manifestations of menopause have plagued me and the goddesses at one time or another. Inability to concentrate, butterfly mind (winging from thing to thing without alighting long on any one), jellyfish brain, ADD (attention deficit disorder), forgetfulness, dyslexia, and more have at times dwarfed the physical and emotional symptoms. Yuck.
The weirdest is when you have several of these in the course of a single day. If my brain is not going to work, I at least would like it to malfunction in the same way for a time. So I can figure out how to deal with it.
And now, a new mental effect is afflicting me. I’m going to call it Menopause Demotivation Syndrome. After all, we seem to name everything these days to make it sound important at best and necessitating treatment at worst.
Living in two places requires that my husband and I essentially move twice a year. Which means making reservations, packing, organizing house sitters and repair personnel, etc. I’m not complaining – life is good, if slightly disorienting sometimes.
I’ve always been a self starter. I get stuff done. Or maybe I should say “I got things done.” These days? Not so much. Oh, I eventually get things done, but I feel my drive to do even those high priority items slipping into neutral.
Which is why, a week out from our departure from Hawaii to the mainland, I am still trying to get into gear. First gear would be okay, although with each day that passes, a higher gear will be needed.
Panic mode used to be a motivator. That helped. I can’t find that mode anymore. Or the mode where I put my head down and just do one task after another, forcing the motivation. Nor can I access the mode where I delight in organizing, packing, and planning.
In fact, it is taking every last shred of discipline I have just to write my blog entry for this week. I fear that I will exhaust my infinitesimal supply of get-up-and-go just doing this. I’m not sure this is hormonal, although it could be (by the way, goddesses, the decrease HRT project is going swimmingly, although I’m not sorry to leave Hawaii for the summer as it is heating up a bit.)
Perhaps this demotivation is naturally occurring phenomenon due to aging? What do you think? Am I the only one? And do you have any tips for kicking into gear? Because I seriously need to get packing.
Right now though, I think I’ll have a cup of espresso……..Better make it a double!