The Toilet Paper Article of the Week: Fathers, Don’t Let Your Daughters Date…(John Mayer)
Posted Feb 12 2010 3:00am
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He’s won four Grammysjams with blues legendsand has dated some of the best-looking women in show business. Nonethelessthe verbal diarrhea that continually spews from John Mayer’s mouth has us wondering if the guy has sh!t for brains.
Recent interviews in both Rolling Stone and Playboy have been both bizarre and baffling. Whether discussing past conquestshis proclivity for pulling his pudor just blurting out racist nonsensical musingsMayer seems hell bent on committing professional suicide.
In factMayer may be the first singer-songwriter that could boost his career by shutting his mouth.
Number
$20M – Value Mayer claims his vintage watch collection is worth.
You know what time it is? Time to get ill.
Quote
“It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.”
Mark Twain
Word
frank
adj. 1. Blunt: characterized by directness in manner or speech. 2. Hot dog. 3. Lloyd Wright.
Fact
Mayer played the clarinet in middle school. It wasn’t until he was 13 and saw Michael J. Fox shred as Marty McFly in Back to the Future that he became interested in guitar. His dad rented a Washburn acoustic for him. Mayer never quit playing.
The List
When Publicists Vacation
Mel Gibson – “Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world.” This is patently offensive and ridiculousMel. It’s the Muslimsyou goofball.
Hulk Hogan – “I totally understand OJ. I get it.” The Hulkster being questioned about his feelings regarding his ex-wife Linda and her then 19-year-old lover.
Kanye West – “George Bush doesn’t care about black people.” That’s certainly a broad brush to paint withKanye. Thoughwe can think of one he almost certainly doesn’t dig.
Mariah Carey – “I’d love to be skinny like thatbut not with all those flies and death and stuff.” The non-Mensa-membership-holding songstress after seeing starving children on television.
Here’s an article from our friends over at The Toilet Paper. To subscribe to their free ball busting daily newsletterclick here.
He’s won four Grammysjams with blues legendsand has dated some of the best-looking women in show business. Nonethelessthe verbal diarrhea that continually spews from John Mayer’s mouth has us wondering if the guy has sh!t for brains.
Recent interviews in both Rolling Stone and Playboy have been both bizarre and baffling. Whether discussing past conquestshis proclivity for pulling his pudor just blurting out racist nonsensical musingsMayer seems hell bent on committing professional suicide.
In factMayer may be the first singer-songwriter that could boost his career by shutting his mouth.
Number
$20M – Value Mayer claims his vintage watch collection is worth.
You know what time it is? Time to get ill.
Quote
“It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.”
Mark Twain
Word
frank
adj. 1. Blunt: characterized by directness in manner or speech. 2. Hot dog. 3. Lloyd Wright.
Fact
Mayer played the clarinet in middle school. It wasn’t until he was 13 and saw Michael J. Fox shred as Marty McFly in Back to the Future that he became interested in guitar. His dad rented a Washburn acoustic for him. Mayer never quit playing.
The List
When Publicists Vacation
Mel Gibson – “Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world.” This is patently offensive and ridiculousMel. It’s the Muslimsyou goofball.
Hulk Hogan – “I totally understand OJ. I get it.” The Hulkster being questioned about his feelings regarding his ex-wife Linda and her then 19-year-old lover.
Kanye West – “George Bush doesn’t care about black people.” That’s certainly a broad brush to paint withKanye. Thoughwe can think of one he almost certainly doesn’t dig.
Mariah Carey – “I’d love to be skinny like thatbut not with all those flies and death and stuff.” The non-Mensa-membership-holding songstress after seeing starving children on television.
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