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Coughed Up Run Down Bitch

Posted May 11 2013 6:50pm

I feel drenched in pain. I don't know what is causing what anymore, there are too many factors as to why. 

After my fourth treatment this week, I disintegrated. I was staring at a muffin, thinking, how could I ever muster the energy to eat this? 

On Thursday, I awoke to feelings of the flu and decided on a quick muscle test and potential IV prior to the brain mapping treatment. It turns out, I am simply exhausted and my body is in a state of uproar over instability within it. My skin is hot and feverish due thyroid dysfunction, my throat hurts, I am nauseous because of irritation, my head feels as if it is going to plop off, I can barely see, I have the experience of dizziness, and overall body stress. Emotionally, I am numb. Why? I can't say, perhaps because I am also phasing off Zyprexa and onto Abilify, perhaps because my body is so upset it can no longer house the emotional function I live with daily. Three cheers for getting things done. 
For some reason, the usual Meyer's without Magnesium only barraged the incoming dysfunct. Eventually, my body called out for a 1 1/2 hour Vitimin C IV because, as luck would have it, I am detoxing like mad due to the splint in my mouth. 
I am now toxic with the endotoxins, medications, foods, environment my body has stored through treatment over the past five years. My body is saying- now is the time to rid myself of it. Now. I have to listen. I have no choice at this point. I usually love detox, I can literally feel myself healing but this is overkill. I envision it like a faucet, now the handle has been turned, the gateways are open, and the toxins are shooting outward. 
The issue is inflammation. Over this past week, my naturopath had a family emergency and was unable to see me. I could've caught this, whatever this is, but that is alright. I have an appointment with her on Monday- the same day I am driving two hours both ways to see my splint specialist. The next day, I have therapy in West Seattle and psychiatry in the outskirts in Woodinville...This is, how you say, a lot.
I know the cure for this feeling, it is a treatment issued by the clinic's spa called a Detox Seaweed Wrap. I used to have one weekly when I was detoxing from Oxycodone and they were astounding. I need one to get back on track. However, this is yet another appointment and I feel torn already. 
You know, I am proud of myself for maintaining a level of cool through all of this. The stress I feel is body, not mind. My body has peaked. Though I am busy in other ways, I cancelled my brain mapping yesterday, giving me six days to rest. Hopefully the irritation and exhaustion will canter into the sunset. Though, I feel emotionally worse today than I did yesterday. 
Thursday basically broke my reserve. I had an IV while brain mapping after spending three hours at the clinic with nothing to eat. I did everything wrong. Well, now I know. 
At this point I am worried. I don't know how to recover from this. I need time and most likely supplementation or special treatments. Inflammation makes me irritated, always pushing outwards when I desperately need to pull in. 
OK. I feel better now. I realize what I must do: 
1) Schedule a Detox Wrap. 2) See my naturopath and refocus my supplements to treat the dysfunction 3) Take a break from brain mapping 4) Gently detoxify my system with foot baths, leaving enemas for when I am more balanced 5) Hold off on altering my psych meds further until I am sure they are not causing the alarm
Basically, stabilize before proceeding further and consult those with training because I don't have to carry this alone. 
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