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Dreaming deafness

Posted Dec 12 2008 6:33pm

Woke up early today from a vivid dream… Behind Closed Eyelids

I was at a banquet or an award show or like, and the hostess and host of the show somehow pointed me out among a lot of people and started making their way towards me.
That would normally be the last thing I would wish for, as I have had a lifelong fear of appearing stupid in case I answered wrong. (you know, if I didn’t hear the question properly, I would answer something else, thus making it funny for everyone…)
With microphones jammed up in my face and spotlight zooming in on me along all the attention from everyone present, they started asking me easy questions I was able to answer ok, you know, to warm me up… 
Then the guy came “to the point” and halfway into his question I lost him completely. That would be where I normally wanted to sink into the ground and die of shame or embarrassment. In this dream I just said: “I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you.” Being very calm inside, laid back and not stressed, I waited for their next move. Somehow the social pressure on me was gone, because they had a show to pull off, and by picking me the “joke” was on them. I could see the guy lost his nerves and didn’t know what to do. At such instances I feel terribly sorry for the person, and want to help, but in this situation they were interviewing me, and I could not help by taking charge of the conversation as I normally would.
The woman stepped in for a try and she failed too…. then I woke up, wide awake…

This was a weird good dream for me. Can’t remember last time I had a dream about being out there publicly. And the thing that hits me about this dream is that I’m just being me and honest about it (that I can’t hear everything), unlike before in my life, where I’d have a number of strategies for “handling” such a situation, thus “saving face”. Doesn’t matter what kind of situation I’m in, I’m who I am… Near deaf and all :-)

I think this dream was some kind of milestone for me.

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