A creepy looking man in a dark alley, wearing an old, dirty hat and a stained trench coat calls to you as you pass by. “Psst! Hey you! Yeah, YOU! What’s in your head right now? You can imagine what’s been in mine to get me here in this position. Can you spare a happy thought? A positive juju to get me through the night?”
Okay, so like… that’s probably not going to happen to you EVER lol, but I wanted to use that arresting visual.
So, let’s just STOP and take a look at what’s been in your head today. What have you been thinking about? Have you been worrying? Have you been fuming over something that happened or something someone said or something that’s going on at work or home right now? Have you been scared? Are you sad? Have you been just “convinced” that something is going to happen i.e. boss being mad, husband not picking something up, principal calling about the kids from school, an important piece of mail not arriving, etc.? Have you been thinking that _______ sucks, never works, never happens, always happens, etc.?
STOP and write down some of the most prevalent stuff in your head so far today and be honest. No one will know and no one is looking. Do this for yourself. Look at your list of stuff and know this:
THIS IS WHAT YOU ARE INVITING INTO YOUR LIFE!
Is it anything you want? If you’re worried about something, do you want that worry to happen and do you want more things to worry about? If you’re fuming about something or someone, do you want more to fume about? If you’re sad, do you want more heartache? More things to cry about? If something always or never happens, do you want it to continue to always or never happen?
I didn’t think so. I can hear your question… Yeah, so how do I change it?
You change it by being mindful. Being mindful means, you go about your usual business with the intention that you’re going to “catch” yourself thinking these negative thoughts. Just for today, just for this next hour - try to catch yourself thinking this stuff. When you do, say to yourself, “stop” or “cancel” and replace your negative thought with what you’d really like to happen. But… don’t say it from lack because that’s the same as saying the negative thing. For instance, you wouldn’t want to say, “I just want this freakin’ thing to work!” because saying it that way implies it isn’t working. Instead, see whatever it is working smoothly and intend for it to go smoothly. Do not even entertain the idea that it might not work. Before you even start it, see it and feel it as if it has already happened - as if it has already gone smoothly. How does that feel?
Envisioning an open parking space and expecting to find one is totally different than saying, “I hate coming into this part of town, there are never any parking spaces!” The energy is completely different and so is your intent.
You can start small. Pick one of those negative thoughts you wrote down and try to catch yourself thinking it during the next hour. Just for the next hour. Replace it with your preferred outcome and then notice your stress level. It’ll go down. Negative thoughts continually jab us in the ass with a red hot poker, driving us to bad choices, bad feelings, and pressure that many times isn’t even really there.
Ladies and gentlemen, this is your mission, should you choose to accept it: Slow down. Catch yourself thinking a negative thought. Say “stop” or “cancel” and immediately replace it with your desired outcome (crafting it carefully not to come from lack) and FEEL that your desired outcome has already occurred. This message will self-destruct in 5 4 3 2 1.