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Time to Go Back to Start

Posted Mar 30 2013 9:56pm
Remember when you were little and in board games, there was always the dreaded 'Go Back to Start' square? Yeah, that stunk back then, right?
Well, I have been doing a lot of thinking and a lot of being sick this week and the 'Go Back to Start' is exactly what I need.
Yep, not going to pout about it, and definitely not going to quit the game!

I guess I have carried around a lot of 'stuff' for a long time.We all do, right?I have just been having a few more reality checks than I know what to do with lately.I know I don't talk about it much, because I don't feel it is who I am today.But I know that all the years I put my body through hell with the easting disorders, I know it is to blame for the stomach troubles I have now. No, no one has confirmed that and I don't think they could.I just think that common sense says that you can't put your body through that kind of crazy crap and not have some remnants of it hang around. I have made peace with my past and with the ED.It is foolish to believe that you ever get away from it completely.Because of this, you have to own it and keep moving forward.
I have been sick with stomach issues since Thursday.Truth be told, it pisses me off.I don't want food allergies. I don't want a laundry list of foods that I can't have because they make me physically sick. However, I've got them and there is nothing I can do about it. So it is time to suck it up and 'Go Back to Start'.
I started running to keep myself in check.There are days I love to run and days that I think it totally sucks.Right now, I am not enjoying running.I want to run. I am glad that I went for a run. I feel good while I am running and when I am done.But for whatever reason, I am not enjoying the experience.That doesn't make a whole lot of sense, right? Ha! It does, I promise!
Anyway, I am not going to bore you with the details. But yep...This girl is rolling with the punches and getting with the program.
And Going Back to Start!
 Ummm...this blog has been half written for 2 hours. Ha!Kabocha got in the way!
My friends, I hope you have a wonderful Easter with your family and friends.
I found this quote today: "When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be."
Love it!
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