Bad news, y’all: spring break begins exactly nine days from today, and two months on the college social scene have done nothing for our waistlines.
I will be returning to the tropical clime of Buffalo, NY, so I’m not particularly concerned about my less-than-bikini-ready figure.For all of you lucky vacationers, however – totally hate you, by the way – you better modify your party habits stat.Even one drink contains an amazing amount of calories, and I’m assuming you imbibe more than two or three a night.
THANKFULLY, my dear readers, I have compiled a list of five ways you can party in a less caloric way.They may not take effect in time for this year’s spring break, but summer is allegedly approaching…
1.Dance it up.Last weekend’s 20 Watts After Party was more like an aerobic work-out than anything – guests were jumping up and down, dudes were challenging each other to v. intense dance-offs, and everyone was a little bit sweaty/gross.They had a good idea going there, though: a 135-pound woman burns 589 calories in two hours of fast dancing.Considering Keystone Light, the beer of choice among cheap party hosts, has 103 calories per can, you’re actually looking at a net loss of 280 calories.Whoa!Way better than the gym.
2.Lay off the mixed drinks.Hard liquor is technically more calorie-conscious than beer, since you drink less of it in a night, but throw some juice into the equation and things get really sketchy.One Solo cup of cranberry juice contains 232 calories; for orange juice, a cupful is 224. Y’all better just get used to taking shots.
3.Watch your pre-game.From a purely caloric standpoint, it makes more sense to get drunk in as few drinks as possible.Know your limits, though, and know your body.Legit.
4.Eat earlier.Alcohol impedes fat burning – your body runs off it before it runs off of other nutrients in your system.So unfortunately, if you devour a plateful of Shaw macaroni only hours before going out, you can expect that Shaw macaroni to hang out around your abdomen. Eat your big meal earlier in the day to avoid this calamity and get drunk faster (see tip #3).
5.Avoid pot like the plague.Cannabinoids like marijuana interfere with leptin, the hormone that governs satiety.It’s that hormone that causes you to dial up Dominos every time you get high… and I don’t think you want me to list the calorie content of a 555.
Do you have more tips?BETTER tips, even?Leave them in the comments and I’ll check them out!Until next week then, Syracusians – party on.
Caitlin Dewey is a sophomore dual magazine journalism and international relations with a minor in Spanish and English textual studies. She has written for The Daily Orange and The Buffalo News and interned for artvoice. Her weekly column “Party Flavor” is going to cover the oh-so “healthy” party life we enjoy every Thursday with some humor, of course.