No this is not a post about healthy oreo breakfast sandwiches, this is a confession.
Many times I have heard family and friends tell me that they don’t want to start running, working out, eating healthy, etc because they are afraid of failure. They worry that they won’t see weight loss or feel any better physically or mentally. And if they do, what happens if they fall off of the proverbial bandwagon?
The truth is, when it comes to taking steps to healthy living you will feel like a failure at times.
Healthy living isn’t a game or a competition. There is no end. It’s your habits, your routine, aspects that improve your health that you enjoy doing.
But every now and then, life will get in the way. Your schedule will change, your child will get sick, you will get hurt, you will stress. Sometimes working out is put on the back burner because you have other things in your life that take priority. Sometimes you just want that chocolate ice cream cone because you know it will make you smile after a difficult day.
Many times, all the above will make you feel like a failure. But you’re not. This is life.
I know, because I am feeling like a failure now. My hip hurts, I am anxiety ridden about retaking a exam that is pinnacle in my doctoral program, we have introduced a new member into my family I would like to call nanny, my husband isn’t home because his work schedule is crazy, and I feel like I am about to fall apart. My healthy living attitude is below sub-par.
With that said I haven’t ran in forever, my diet is a mess, and meditation has slipped through my fingers. In most peoples eyes I have failed at this journey I have taken, I have failed at healthy living. But the truth is, this is life. We are all given hard times to learn to work through them. For years, I have used food to help me get through stressful moments. My name is Amanda and I am an emotional eater and I am currently battling my old habits and urges, hoping that I will not fall back into the same routine of eating myself to happiness.
Today I woke up at 4:30, just to see if I could. To see if I was able to get a moment to myself to think, to breath, to listen. It worked. I didn’t work out, I didn’t clean the house or prep for my day of work. I meditated. Allowing myself to see that I can find time for me within a schedule that seems to be busting at the seams. To see that I do have control.
Failure shouldn’t be feared, it should be embraced. I have learned more about myself in the last three week then I have in the last few months. Failure allows for me to see that I can continue to grow. So I had Oreo cookies for breakfast a week straight. It happens, I’m not proud… but I am not going to deny it. Food is a problem that I continually struggle with and probably will the rest of my life.
It’s just time to get back on my horse and refocus myself and reorganize my schedule. I can’t beat myself up over it.
Without failure there is no such thing as personal growth.