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Posted Apr 29 2011 3:18pm

Nothing says Suburban life like centipedes everywhere. You can spray your house for spiders, but those centipedes will not go away for anything. They be climbin’ in yo windows, snatchin’ yo people up.

So you better

Hide yo’ kids

Hide yo’ wife

and for the love of god, hide yo’ damn dirty laundry, because those little suckers LOVE to hide in damp towels. I crush them with a bottle of Tide. Either that, or I just set the bottle of Tide on top of them…and never pick it up.

Yesterday, one just happened to gleefully make its way down from the ceiling, or god knows where, on to the floor right in front of me as I was cooking breakfast. They keep you on your toes, and the hair on your arms on end at all times.

So imagine my surprise when I saw one just hanging out, right in the open in my basement.

Yeah I used like 4000x zoom. I have a REALLY GOOD camera. No, not really, but hell if I was getting anywhere near this guy.

Did I kill it? No. Of course not. He was totally out of my reach. Use a vacuum? I challenge anyone to find ANYTHING scarier than trying to VACUUM A RAPID CRAWLING INSECT THAT COULD FLY AT YOUR FACE OR CRAWL DOWN THE VACUUM AND EAT YOU.

It was either he goes, or I go, and so I went.

Took the dogs to the dog park & let that guy come down at his own pace. My dad would later come home to kill it, but for the sake of this blog post, the suspense was definitely there.

I didn’t really realize how difficult it is to walk two dogs. Miley just wants to run constantly and Layla stops and smells and/or picks up anything and everything she sees. And when they both spot a squirrel, I’m powerless to stop them so I just end up flailing behind them.

This photo was staged.


That's a cute. That's a furry ball of fluff stumpy-legged cute.

Both the dogs attempting the great escape

Bat Dogs

On the way home….

The end result:

Two pooped puppies leaves me free to make my lunch.

A ‘Lazy Pizza’

1 whole wheat pita bread

salsa + agave chili sauce (a spoonful of each)

low fat mozzarella

sliced red peppers

*there would be spinach on there, had I not run out of it. :(

Put it in the oven or toaster oven for 8-ish minutes, until the cheese is brown & bubbly.

Et voila! Lazy Pizza. Takes about 4% effort to make. Tastes awesome.

The weather is actually getting progressively nicer as this day goes on, so I’m definitely going rollerblading today.

What’s your go-to “Lazy Meal”?

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