Day 9: I'm human, I'm not perfect!

Yesterday was a proof of that statement. I didn't work and I overdo oncarbs. I don't know what happened but after working 4 hours in the morning, I decided to take my afternoon off because it was hard to focus on what I was doing and I got very anxious about (God knows what). When I have to double to check everything that I do to make sure I'm during it right, then, it's a sign that I'm not in my productive mode. So, afternoon of no work in a rainy day, what would you do? Sleep a nap, read a book, watch a movie and MUNCHES!!! I over do in carbs department.... I kept craving bread/toasts/cereals..... so I went for them. It was a more than overdo!!! But I wouldn't call it a binge, because I wanted it and I was conscious about what I was doing and the best part? I didn't feel guilty and went to bed extremely early to sleep (that's usually what carbs do to me, give me a good night sleep).

okay. some recap... note I didn't take pic of everything (I guess you guys will get bored if you see 10 pics of the same bread!)
Breakfast was normal: a VERY creamy bowl of steel cuts, only steel cuts. I changed the method of preparing it and it turned out soocreamy. Instead of soaking it overnight and cook it for shorter time, I cooked it directly with more water for longer time (an hour probably).
In the mix: 1/4 c. dry steel cuts, 1/2 c. almond milk, 2 tbsp egg white, 1/2 banana. topped with PB and blueberries. Yummy~~~
This bowl would have hold me for 6 hours for sure, but I was snacky so I had this this ( 2serv. size of mixgranola ) and this
Then Lunch Salad: greens, alfalfa sprouts, baby beets, edadame, peppers and octopus, dressing was olive and lemon juice. Delicious~~
Dessert: white fungus jelly strawberries And then, the carbscraving began
first toasted muffin (plain) and then 5 slices of WW bread I had a long nap after that! Woke up, feeling more tired. Did 90 min yoga at home, felt more energized and ready for a l ight dinner: Kale chips and baked kabocha. a half blooded orange
And Dessert was another indulgent dairy free chocolate pudding. I would call that a over-do day if I ended up my eats there, but NO!!! My day didn't stop that. I had 5 slices more of WW bread, I finished the package!!!
oh...man.... I had a huge belly EXPANSION.
I fall into sleep as a baby! ^_^

I know many of you have experienced that and felt awful afterward, I was like that before. But I'm so glad that I don't feel guilty anymore.... what it's done, it's done. I didn't break anything, I just over do a little bit... but I am human, no one is perfect, as long as I return to my normal ME and be indulgent to myself..... everything would be fine! I think the trigger of serial binge is that you do not tolerate yourself of being not perfect, you punish yourself by making you feel even worse so you binge more. Okay, then stop this vicious cycle by forgive your first over do. (sorry if this hurts someone in the stage of ED, it's some random thoughts).

Today is Tuesday, I am proud to say that I slept 9 hours non-stop and it put me in a great mood! ^_^ Obviously, I'll adjust my eats today cutting back on carbs.

Question: Are you indulgent to yourself?