The other night, I bought a bag of Swedish Fish candy on my way home from work, and ate about half the bag on the bus. Once home, I was tired and listless and really didn't feel like throwing together a meal from any of the ingredients I had on hand, so I walked the three blocks to my grocery store and purchased a DiGiorno pepperoni pizza "for one," a 20-oz diet Coke, and a "single size" carton of Dibs ice cream. And proceeded to eat it all.
Which got me thinking about binge eating. Do I do it? Wikipedia tells me that binge eating means that I would eat an excessive amount of food quickly, hide it from others, and feel depressed afterward - basically. In order to have binge eating disorder, I'd have to engage in this kind of behavior around twice a week for at least three months. So while I often eat too much, and certainly feel bad about it afterward, I think I can rest assured that I don't have binge eating disorder. But I'm not so sure that I don't occasionally binge. In the meal (such as it was) described above, I probably had 1300 calories including the candy, and it's not like I hadn't eaten all day. Portion control is something I'm really going to have to tackle, and soon, and it's one of the diet changes that I feel the most anxious about, to be honest. In the past I've tried to watch what I eat, but rarely concentrated on reducing what I eat, figuring that will come once eating good-for-me food becomes a habit. But of course, I usually didn't make it that far.
One of the worst habits I picked up over the past few years is the ability to eat junk food-y snacks without batting an eye. There was a period of a few months a couple years ago where I'd pick up a "snack" at the gas station a couple times a week, maybe - usually a bottle of diet soda, a bag of chips or Cheez-its, and a box of candy or a candy bar. Ugh. And while I've mostly broken that habit, I still can inhale a bag of Cheetos or something without really thinking about it.
It's gonna be tricky to change this habit. A little bit at a time, right?