Being Judgmental & Critical of Others, Do You Judge or Feel Judged, New Hair Stylist
Posted Sep 22 2010 1:54pm
Hi Friends! I hope your Hump Day is going wonderfully. I got in a nice lifting session at the gym, ran a few errands, and am working later on. Yesterday I had a great hair salon appointment and got my color touched up. I went to a new salon and a new colorist. My last one was "just okay" so I decided to try someone new yesterday and I'm so glad I did.
I am really happy with the color. I don't know why it's so hard to touch up roots and re-growth and just get everything to blend, but it's the age-old hair stylist and color dilemma but I am really happy with my new stylist!
I brought my new Macbook to the hair salon yesterday and my inbox was blowing up with great, supportive, positive comments . Thank you everyone! And thanks to newer readers, de-lurkers, and infrequent commenters for chiming in.
I was happy to hear that allof you who commented are open-minded about others who get tats, even if they're not your thing. And some of you are tat fans or are well-inked yourself. Thanks for sharing!
Most of you told me that you want to see the tattoo in-progress but plenty of you said that you'd rather have a Big Reveal and post the stages and progress with the reveal.
Not sure what I am going to do yet. Still debating because I really want the first time you all see it to be like BAM, WOW, there it is, all done, in all it's glory. But I will say that the outline is done, the black and gray shading is done, and when I go back, it will be for color. I had a 5 hour session so far with probably another 5-6 hours to go. At least one more long session and then perhaps a third, quickie session.
So many different choices and books out there, but the Moosewood Cookbook came up a few times, as did Ani's books, Vegomicon, Eat Drink and Be Vegan, but most of you just go online these days it sounds like.
Questions 1. Do you like your hair stylist? I've posted Here about cheating on your stylist before. On a scale from 1 to 10, what do you do if you're at about a 6 or 7 with your stylist? Meaning they do a decent job, and things could be far worse, but things could also be better.
It's like should you suck it up and deal with "pretty good", or gamble and try to find that Perfect Person, knowing that in the process, you could wind up with a horrible situation. And it's your hair. I take all kinds of risks in life, but my hair is not one I like to take risks with.
I have gambled on certain stylists and had awful results but also great results. I guess that's why they call it A Gamble!
Moving on to the Hot Topic I've been wanting to discuss for awhile.... I am not bringing this up in response to yesterday's tattoo post . You guys were great and thank you for the support and tattoo lovin'! It's just one of those "it's been on my mind" for awhile things; both as it relates to the blogosphere and real life. So I figured I talk about it.
2. Do you consider yourself to be judgmental of others? Are you Critical of them because they live differently than you? Do you care what others do?
I consider myself to be very non-judgmental of others' choices.
I don't care or judge if you eat meat or drink a fifth of whiskey a day.
I don't care or judge if you went from being vegan to not vegan anymore.
I don't care or judge if you don't workout, or if you work out compulsively.
I don't care or judge you if you're obese, skinny, short, tall, black, white, gay, straight, or a post-op transsexual.
I don't care or judge if you're non-Christian, or if you believe Jesus is the only answer.
I don't care or judge if you gamble, have unprotected sex, or walk the streets for money.
I don't care or judge if you are covered in tattoos and swear a ton.
I don't care or judge if take your child to the zoo, Sea World, the circus, or the horse track or if you don't.
Different strokes for different folks, knock your socks off, do what you want,and let me do what I want without being critical or judgmental.
I really don't care what other people do. I may not be best of friends with them, I wouldn't invite them over for dinner necessarily, but I don't try to save or change them or look down on them.
I would hope or like to think that the choices they make don't adversely effect my life, but that's not reality either. i.e. obese people cost more to insure and my health insurance rates go up, but whatever. That's the price to pay for living in the world with others. Others' choices do effect you, like it or not. In the meantime, I do my best to not judge them or get my undies in a bundle over what they're doing or not doing and just carry on with my own life and mind my own business and do my own thing.
They have lived their life, made their choices, and whether or not I "approve" of the path they have taken is irrelevant; and, to judge them harshly would be not feel right to me.
If one believes in a God or a higher power, I believe the role of judgment should be left for a higher power, certainly not my role! Or any of our roles. However, humans are not perfect and judgment happens. All the time.
Frankly, I am too busy living my own life, worrying about what I need to do every day, parenting my own child, cutting up my own carrot sticks, to worry that you're unwrapping a Twinkie. Nor do I care, one iota.
I have my character flaws and issues to work on; we all do. I am not perfect, but I try to look in the mirror every day, dig deep, find that place of acceptance an peace with others, even if I don't agree with their choices.
And it's always my hope that for those people who are judging me, or judgmental of any of us, that they find a place of peace and comfort and can move past their issues. Because it becomes about them, not me, and I try not to take too much of it personally, but easier said than done when you're the recipient of the judgment and criticism.
How do you think you're doing on being judgmental or critical of others who are different from you?
4. Do you feel judged by others? In what aspects of your life? I am judged all the time about the way I look, the way I parent, the way I eat, the tattoos I have, the pictures I post on my blog, the things I write about, it goes on and on. I try to brush it off. Some things are easier to dismiss than others, of course.
But I find that when someone really is hammering me about something, being very critical, judging me harshly, that I am bringing something up in them that they need to work on, or become more mindful or aware of. It has very little to do with me, I am just the conduit, the vessel, that is bringing up these feelings in them. I could be anyone, so I try to not take their judgment too personally. Easier said than done in some situations, of course.
Thanks, Friends for making the world interesting! If we were all alike, the world would be boring!
Please let me know your thoughts on all of this!Please, let's keep the comments respectful on this post, everyone. Swearing is fine, hatred is not. Passion is fine, closed-mindedness is not. You get the point.