At one time or another we have all caught ourselves staring. We will stare at someone that looks different, someone who might be handicap or maybe even someone who is missing a limb. And I will be honest I was guilty of this until 10 years ago when my daughter came into this world missing her left hand due to Amniotic Band Syndrome. From that day forward, I’ve never stared because I know how it feels to be on the other end of the stare.
I have also told my daughter that people stare because they don’t understand or they have not been taught that we are all different in one way or another, it’s just that some of our differences are more noticeable than others. And I never really truly understood what I was teaching her until recently.
My daughter and I were at a museum and we were walking around and a little girl noticed her hand and ran over to her dad and started asking questions and staring. The dad tried to pull the little girl away. I watched as my daughter’s face went from a frown to a smile, she stode up straight as could be and walked over to the little girl and her dad and said to the dad, “It is ok. I was born this way and if she wants to ask questions I would rather her do that than stare.” My jaw hit the floor. The dad said. “I am so sorry.” My daughter said, “Don’t be sorry, next time just let her ask.” My daughter then went on to tell the little girl all about her little hand. It made me one proud Mama.
So often we forget that the people we are staring at have feelings too. We forget that we are probably putting them in a very uncomfortable position. So next time you catch yourself staring or catch your children staring think of my daughter and either stop staring or just go up and ask. We prefer you ask.
At one time or another we have all caught ourselves staring. We will stare at someone that looks different, someone who might be handicap or maybe even someone who is missing a limb. And I will be honest I was guilty of this until 10 years ago when my daughter came into this world missing her left hand due to Amniotic Band Syndrome. From that day forward, I’ve never stared because I know how it feels to be on the other end of the stare.
I have also told my daughter that people stare because they don’t understand or they have not been taught that we are all different in one way or another, it’s just that some of our differences are more noticeable than others. And I never really truly understood what I was teaching her until recently.
My daughter and I were at a museum and we were walking around and a little girl noticed her hand and ran over to her dad and started asking questions and staring. The dad tried to pull the little girl away. I watched as my daughter’s face went from a frown to a smile, she stode up straight as could be and walked over to the little girl and her dad and said to the dad, “It is ok. I was born this way and if she wants to ask questions I would rather her do that than stare.” My jaw hit the floor. The dad said. “I am so sorry.” My daughter said, “Don’t be sorry, next time just let her ask.” My daughter then went on to tell the little girl all about her little hand. It made me one proud Mama.
So often we forget that the people we are staring at have feelings too. We forget that we are probably putting them in a very uncomfortable position. So next time you catch yourself staring or catch your children staring think of my daughter and either stop staring or just go up and ask. We prefer you ask.