I took the picture of the jeans down from my monitor. I think it was doing me more harm than good. The original idea was to have the picture be a motivational tool. I would look at the picture of my goal and think about what I should or shouldn’t do to achieve it. But the problem was it was just making me feel bad about myself. Looking at my “skinny” jeans didn’t stop me from eating the junk food in the breakroom. When I did eat it, I didn’t even enjoy myself. Instead of feeling like I should be able to enjoy a holiday treat sometimes and that some were definitely worth it, I’d look at the jeans and think that I’d failed and I would never reach my goal. My mother always tells me that when I’m upset about something and talking/thinking about it, instead of getting it off my shoulders and feeling better, I always get even more worked up. It’s kind of the same thing when I get down on myself, my negativity just breeds even more negativity. So for right now, I choose to remove the source of the immediate problem. It’s not the source of everything, but if I’m trying just as hard in my weight loss efforts, removing a picture that turned out to be almost a trigger for low self esteem can’t hurt anything.
Onwards and upwards.
I’m actually quite proud of myself for my attention to portion control yesterday. We had a holiday luncheon at Muss & Turners. I ordered The Hummer (giggle, giggle) and when it came it was pretty big. I ate half and the put the rest in a box to eat for lunch today. Half was plenty. I also went out to dinner at Mali for my friend Joan’s birthday. I had two pieces of sushi as an appetizer and then ate about half of my entree. I had some sort of shrimp and scallop stir-fry.