Hi! I’m checking in with a second post today. Who am I? I can barely fit in daily posts, let alone twice daily ones. I felt a need to share some information with you today. I’m not just a food & fitness blogger, I really like sharing personal development lessons that have made a positive impact on my life. Two of my favorite things about growing older are the lessons that you learn and passing that advice onto others.
When I was taking a bath last night, I was relaxing and not really thinking about anything in particular. All of a sudden, the phrase crossed my mind, “Everyone comes in and out of your life at certain times for a reason.” This is something that my mom said to me when I was younger and has stuck with me ever since. After that thought crossed my mind, I felt an overwhelming urge to write a blog post about it. So possibly, there is one or more reader out there who might need to read this post today.
“Everyone comes in and out of your life at a certain time for a reason”
This lesson can be applied to friends, family members, co-workers, boyfriends, girlfriends, spouses, neighbors, grocery store cashiers, etc. Every single person you meet or have a relationship with is placed in your life for a greater purpose. The lessons that you learn from that person are meant to help your soul grow and develop. Think about some of the influential people that you have known in your life. What have you learned from them? How did they make you feel? Are they still in your life today? The answers to each of these questions helped to shape the person you are today.
Sometimes I wonder why a particular person is in my life. Sometimes I can pinpoint what I think the reason is, but I also believe that there is an even grander reason that I cannot see at this time in my life. I like to think that the Universe and God have a larger plan than any of us humans can imagine. Have you ever wanted something so badly only to not have your wish come true? Then, something even better than what you had wished for somehow ended up happening. That is how I view life. I can’t understand how or why things happen, but I have Faith that everything happens for a greater reason. That’s part of the reason why I believe that people come in and out of our life for a reason.
Accepting When People Move Out of Your Life
I think that this is the hardest aspect of the lesson to be okay with. When you have a friend or someone close to you who dies or for one reason or another transitions out of your life, it can be painful. It hurts to think that you’ll never experience the fun times that you had with them again. You’d rather have them right there by your side. You might feel angry or hurt that you’ve lost them. I can relate to these feelings. It’s important to let yourself fully experience those feelings. Then, it’s time to do some self talk so you don’t continue to sit with those feelings for too long.
When someone that I care about has left my life, I try to think back to what they taught me and recognize that maybe that was the reason why they in my life. Possibly, there was nothing else that I could have gained from them at this time in my life. I remind myself of todays quote, “Everyone comes in and out of your life at a certain time for a reason.” I try to seek comfort in the fact that there is a greater reason that I might not be able to see right now. Then I try to focus on all of the amazing people and relationships that I DO HAVE in my life. By stepping into a positive mindset, instead of staying in a negative one, I’m able to attract more positive people and experiences into my life.
I also remind myself that it’s okay to lose a friend, leave jobs or move far away from home. These things help us to grow and mature as a person. We will always have relationships and people who we care for in our life, they just might change over time.
Finding Peace in Unsettling Relationships
Sometimes you wish that someone was already OUT of your life. I know how you feel. There are certain people who just push our buttons. We don’t want to be around them, but for whatever reason, they are in our life at that moment. The first thing that I do when I’m constantly upset with a particular person, is I remind myself that this person is here to teach me a lesson. I try to guess what this life lesson may be. I try to distinguish if the traits this person exemplifies, might possibly be traits of my own that I despise. If that’s the case, I start to work on bettering myself.
If this person has an absolute awful energy and negative attitude about them, I start to feel compassion and empathy towards that person. Another quote that has taught me so much is, “The way you treat others is a reflection of how you feel about yourself.” When I heard that quote, I thought about the people who have treated me poorly and how bad they must feel about themselves. This breaks my heart. I feel so bad for people who don’t like themselves. They have to be with that person 24/7! Therefore, if someone really bothers me and they seem unhappy with themselves, I try to send positive energy their way and understand that the reason they are acting so unkindly has more to do with their own unhappiness than me.
If you need to completely cut someone out of your life (they are abusive, do illegal activities, etc.) I 100% support you. You do not deserve to have this type of behavior in your life. You are strong enough to cut ties with that person and continue living your best life without their drama.
Learning from Others
The most important piece of advice that I hope you take away from this post, is to continually remind yourself that people are in your life for a reason. They are there to help you grow and learn valuable life lessons. They are there to inspire you, comfort you and prepare you for what’s ahead. If we were on our own, in solitary confinement, day in and day out, we might go crazy. If we tried to keep every single person we have ever met in our life and have meaningful relationships with each of them, we would drive ourselves crazy trying to keep up with everyone. By accepting those who are in and out of our life, we can experience peace, personal growth and gratitude.
I will leave you with a poem that helped me to put my long lasting and abruptly ended relationships into perspective.
Reason, Season, or Lifetime
People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you figure out which one it is,
you will know what to do for each person.
When someone is in your life for a REASON,
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty;
to provide you with guidance and support;
to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend, and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.
Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,
this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.
Some people come into your life for a SEASON,
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons;
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person,
and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.