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eating out

Posted May 28 2009 8:17pm

I have lost 65 pounds. I only have 25 pounds to go. For my New Year's resolution, I only need to lose another 10 pounds. I have 7 months to do this. I think I'm gonna make it. I am currently in a loose 14. I started in a 22w. I can see the 8 shining on the rack. My mom is bugging me about buying new clothes. Thus far, I have refrained from doing so by mooching off my once-skinnier relatives and pulling resources out of boxes in my attic and my mom's spare closet. She gave me some slacks with elastic wastebands to wear. I don't know who she thought she was kidding when she bought the size 16 slacks for herself. Yes, I wear them. I feel like a Grandma in them, but I have no choice. It's not like I have the funds for a new wardrobe every time I drop a couple of sizes.

My mom then bought me two pairs of pants for Christmas, which I couldn't wear until mid-January, but now they are increasingly loose. I am currently wearing a pair of jeans I bought... are you ready for this?... 1994. I was 13. I was a size 14. They fit. I'm shocked. The only money I have spent on clothes in the last six months was my prom dress, a few blouses, a couple of school spirit shirts for Fridays, and workout clothes. Whenever I want, I see no reason not to spend $10-15 on jogging pants or a athletic bra. I have bought, shrunk out of, and bought more workout clothes than I can even remember. Oh, and I had to buy new bras because I dropped, well, a lot, and I no longer wear anywhere near the same size. So, my mom, who for the record has not purchased clothes for me since I was 15, is pressuring me to allow her to take me shopping. I want to. I really do. I mean, free clothes! But, I'm not done. I don't want to buy clothes I fall in love with, because I don't want anything to motivate me to stop yet. I wanna be a size 8. I think that is a reasonable request. I can make do with my baggy pants and loose skirts, and my off-the-shoulder tops that aren't supposed to be for a few more sizes, right? Every time I put something on that is unbearably baggy, I pull it off and put it in the Goodwill pile. I have a lot of empty hangers.

I had to get rid of all of my spirit shirts. I was an XL, almost a 2XL, and I had 9 years worth of spirit shirts for my high school, and now I have a total of 3 shirts. They are all new from this semester. They are all a size M. It wasn't my idea to drop to that size. The soccer coach made me. As an ESL teacher, I teach roughly half the boy's soccer team. Because of this pleasure/curse, the coach always gives me free clothes. This year he comes around to give out the playoff shirts during my class because he knew a good amount of my class is his team, and then he turns around to give me a shirt. He looks at me and says "You're a medium now, right?" I looked at him in amazement and I replied "Can I kiss you?" in front of my class, who just started laughing. But the medium fit. It was invigorating, to say the least.

I have seriously enjoyed the ride. I can't wait to see what the next year brings. Here's to sweet potatoes and carrot sticks, the elliptical and spinning class, guys staring at me as I walk by and following me even after I can't see them, and going to a party and actually getting attention. It is intoxicating and addictive. I know I could get used to this. 

I knew May was going to be bad. I had all kinds of stuff in May. But, unlike the disaster that was February, I was prepared. I decided that my goal for this month was to not gain any weight. So far, so good. I feel pretty good about myself. I have not gained weight, and I have lost almost two pounds. All the fun stuff is behind me, and nothing is coming up until July, so June looks fabulous.

Here's what I knew would blow my diet this month:

1) my friend's wedding shower - limited menu - I only ate half my food

2) prom - chaperone - oh, but I did buy a dress and I looked FABULOUS

3) my birthday, with my daughter - Olive Garden

4) my birthday, with my boyfriend - some seafood restaurant

5) my birthday, with my girlfriends - Cheesecake Factory

6) TAKS results celebration with an ex-student - Italian food

6) Memorial Day cookout

7) my sister's birthday - the big 30! - Red Lobster

That's it. Eight restaurants, eight overly rich, high in sodium meals, within 24 days.  I limit my calories to around 1500 per day. As far as I can tell, these eight days - more than a whole week's worth of splurging - each added up to 2250 to 3000 calories. You can blame the 3000 on the Cheesecake Factory. I worked out tremendously this month, as much as I could, and many times I went well over an hour on cardio. I know this is reason I haven't gained weight, no matter what a particular British study shows about exercise not relating to weight gain as much as calorie absorption. I agree with the study, but I also believe my increased exercise this month counteracted my increased calorie intake.


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