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Cash Rules Everything

Posted Dec 05 2010 9:51am

My camera has seen better days .

Better Days

And no, taking this picture could not wait even a single second for me to take off my hat or jacket.

Apparently the front cover of my camera lost its lust for life about a month or so ago.  It’s barely holding on here.  I had to resort to rubber bands, hair ties and super glue to help hold it together.

These materials were doing a fine job of getting my camera through its tough time – and I was especially appreciative of the fact that they saved me from the snotty “Lens Error. Restart Camera. (Bitch.)” message it would give me whenever the lens got caught up in the front cover.

But then things started to get a little hairy. I’m thinking now that super glue was probably not my best idea ever.  I was concerned about the possibility of ADHD when I noticed it was starting to act up and had some trouble focusing… how long can I pretend it’s always made those fun new clicky sounds?

Then Camera decided it didn’t like to download pictures when the face was being held on – probably a little too tightly – by the aforementioned bands of rubber. The super glue gave up it hold weeks ago, but I still had to undo rubber bands every time I wanted to download the contents of my camera to my computer.

I did not like this.

Not only did I have to take the rubber bands off every time I went to download pictures, I would have to hold Princess Camera just. like. so. to get it to comply with my demands.

Hold Camera

And for crying out loud DON’T even think about MOVING the hand that is holding Camera when it’s downloading! This make Camera very angry! This make Camera turn Computer against you too! Suddenly the computer is in on this new plan to electronically torture the human. Nope, sorry Human, I’m not in the mood to recognize your USB device right now. Ask again later.  In binary code.

Well, you know what Point and Shoot? I’ve been wanting something a bit fancier and schmancier for a while now. Keep it up Camera and I’m gonna shop around.

Now, I love threats as much as the next guy, but we don’t exactly have wads of $100 dolla dolla bills y’all just laying around that would be necessary for me to good on this claim. I can’t just run off to buy a new camera the moment my PowerShot SD 960 starts to write me ransom notes in the night, now can I?  Especially during the happy, happiest season of all.

Or maybe I can.

Because then as if on cue, someone pointed out to me that the price of gold is currently quite high, you see.  As a matter of fact, you can get CASH for GOLD with your unwanted or broken jewelry!  Bring it in TODAY! We’ll match any competitor! Refinery Direct! Call now!

gold_price

$1,400.00 an ounce?! I know!

Weeeee here I go! Skip skip skipping merrily off to my jewelry box to dig out all the stuff I’m never gonna wear again – tra la la la la la hi mall jewerly store!  Zen Habits has me all “minimalism is the new black, yo” – I’m more than eager to move superfluous possessions OUT.  Yaaaaayyyyy, let’s sell this stuff to buy new stuff!

It’s a fine line between being a minimalist and a consumerist I tell ya. And I’m gonna take a picture of that line WITH MY BRAND NEW CAMERA.

So just how much gold do I have here anyway? According to my trusty kitchen scale…

NEARLY 1.5 OUNCES!

And here’s where me and my pea-sized brain got a bit ahead of ourselves.

Price of gold x 1.5 = Alison gets in over her head.

Ummm, my math says that’s over TWO THOUSAND DOLLARS!

Holy hoop earrings you mean to tell me I’ve been sitting on a literal gold mine here all this time?! Suddenly visions of Canon and Nikon SLR’s danced through my head.  The camera of my dreams was just a few semi-precious stoned rings away. AND enough money left over to make holiday shopping a breeze? Well knock me over with a sapphire pendant. I’m wrapping everyone’s gifts in $20 and $50 bills this year!

Except yeah. What’s that expression? “If it seems to good too be true, you’re probably a dumb ass?” Something like that.

YES, my little scale DID say 1.5 ounces, except you don’t have 1.5 ounces of PURE GOLD baby girl.

So no – not two grand. Not anywhere near that.  My old point and shoot is still pointing and laughing at me over that one.

But yes, I scrounged enough to manage a little something new.  A little something fancier and pointier and shootier. A little something with a bigger lens and more bells and whistles that I don’t know the first thing about. A little something that’s only been on “AUTO” so far.

Either way, I got to spend some time with a new little friend this weekend.

Dueling Cameras.

Camera Face Off

SD 960 vs. SX 30?

Canon sx30 IS

Always bet on black.

Squash for Breakfast.

Kabocha Oats

1/2 c oats, 1/4 c cooked kabocha squash, 1/4 2% Fage, 1/2 c unsweetened almond milk plus dashes of ginger, nutmeg and cinnamon – soaked over night. Topped with a scoop of almond butter and a tablespoon or so of melted coconut butter .

“You Forgot the Barrette, Mom.”

Still Not Happy

Lord help me.

Better.

Barretts Make It Better

Will you please eat now kid?

No Complaints.

Don't Be Fooled

For now.

New Library Books.

New Library Books

I do like to point at stuff, but for the record – that’s Ava’s finger.

Black Walnuts.

Walnuts Drying

Drying in the attic.

Fig Friends.

Fig Friends

Hanging out on the counter.

Adventures in Penmanship.

Adventures in Penmanship

Who needs a chalk board?

Left Pointer Fingers (Without Bandages)

3+ weeks post finger felon surgery .

Boy That Mirror is Dirty!

Face Stays On

But look how New Camera can hold it all together without any help?  It’s a keeper.

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