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Sunday Confessions XI

Posted Jul 21 2013 10:07pm

1. All my friends know I can be consoled with food.


2. While I was getting my hair done the other day, I kept feeling something itchy in my cleavage but didn’t want to “look into it” if you know what I mean. (And I had the cape on.) Once my hair stylist put me in the other chair to let my color lift, I looked. I had a damn KIND bar in my sports bra. I totally forgot that I put it in there, you know, in case I got hungry at my appointment.

3. And now you’re wondering why I didn’t just stash the bar in my purse. Well, that’s because I ran (literally) to my appointment. The salon is across the street. Why not fit in some exercise?

4. Dumb blonde moment: On the way to the beach, I asked Matt “At what point does Isle of Palms turn into Sullivan’s Island?” Matt: “Uhhh, the bridge.” UGH! Well obbbbbviously an island stops being an island where it touches the water. Ding dong.

sullivan's island, isle of palms

5. I have been having the time of my LIFE going to the gay bars. Why? A sea of good looking men and none of them want me. It’s perfect!!! I can dance with all of them and they won’t creep on me!

6. Boding just yelled at me, “Noooo!! Stop talking about banana hammocks!” Yes, there were mentions of banana hammocks while recapping my evening at Pantheon, the aforementioned bar. There were a lot of those in the building. A lot of feather boas too.

7. I haven’t bought a DVD in years (seriously, it’s been since college), but I’ve been counting down the days until the release of The Great Gatsby. It was the first movie in a really long time that held my attention. I only pulled my phone out of my purse once and it was to look up the name of an actress.

8. The more dates I go on, the more I realize I am not ready to be in a relationship. After having been single for so long (with the exception of being in two mini relationships in the past year), I’ve become so accustomed to being single. It sounds bad, but I like doing whatever I want, on my time, with whom I want. Taking someone else into consideration will be a serious adjustment. I realize that sounds selfish, but that’s what years of independence will do.

9. The last guy I dated pulled the whole “I’m not ready” crap. I called BS, he swore he was being truthful, blah blah blah. Now I find myself on the other side and it’s true: you can be dating someone, and really like them, but not be ready. How messed up is that?

10. Matt’s front door swells from the heat/humidity and we got STUCK in his apartment last weekend. And because he just loves to humiliate me, we have footage. At the very end, you can’t see it, but he asks me why I brought tomato soup over the night before. “I was hungry last night.” Of course I was.

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