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Comfort Zones

Posted Jun 18 2009 1:48pm

Wow, I was asked to do something WAY outside of my comfort zone for our church today. I'm not entirely sure how the whole project will turn out in the end, but I gather that part of our message this weekend is going to be about hypocrisy.

The idea is that they are going to have people milling around our lobby before the two services wearing t-shirts that say things like "my spouse makes me come to church" or "My marriage is a complete wreck"... the interesting part is that the person wearing the shirt will be actually talking to people saying the opposite of what their shirt says. Sort of like the person wearing the shirt that says My marriage is a complete wreck will be walking around telling people how wonderful their husband is and how married life is great.

Anyway, we'll see how it plays out - and the message for the week will explain exactly what's going on... it ought to make for some interesting information to think about. (Hopefully a good follow up post as well).

The point of this post though was to tell you that they asked me to be one of the people wearing a shirt this weekend. I can't do it because of my commitments to the children's ministry and helping with the 2 year olds... but boy would that have put me WAY outside of my bubble of comfort.

For starters, I am not a mingler - you might think so... but NOPE! I am a wall flower of the worst kind - even if I know you, I am too shy to go out of my way to just make small talk. If I need to ask you something - I'll do it, but just to stand there and chat... not really something I'm good at. So I avoid it. At. All. Costs.

This is the same shyness problem that made me absolutely terrified - TERRIFIED - of going to our women's retreat last year. I wasn't given an option to back out - our pastor's wife is cute like that... got to love her! So I went, and honestly loved it... I got to know Renee there a bit more, and the part that I truly loved was that they had a way for us to leave each other encouraging messages that we read when we got home... it was fantastic.

What they'd done was hang these envelopes along the wall in the main meeting cabin and gave us these little pieces of paper to write notes to them on - it could be about anything... and it was so great... and of course - I'm a note writer, emailer, letter writer... whatever kind of writer... I am just completely terrified of the spoken word - when it comes to communicating with people.

How many of you would have guessed that, if I hadn't told you? Honestly... it's bad - my mind goes completely blank, sometimes I can't even catch my breath, and I can't string two thoughts together if my life depended on it. It's an illness - for sure... but it's completely true. Even with John it happens - if I get really flustered. I think that I've gotten better with him, but only slightly... and only with him. This would be why I could NEVER be a debater...

The interesting thing though - for those of you thinking... okay - how did she ever think she could have become a teacher... is that with children - I'm completely at ease. Amazing... I guess the pressure goes away when I'm not wondering if they think I'm an idiot. So I would have been fine with them in the classroom... now when it came time for an evaluation... that day would have scared the living daylights out of me!

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