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Chocolate covered Lima beans shown to cure herpes and syphilis

Posted Apr 01 2010 7:30am

In one of the oddest combinations of food products in recent years, it seems that a dark chocolate covered Lima bean and the correct dosage of Vanilla Coka-Cola has produced an anti-body capable of curing both herpes and syphilis.  This unlikely food combination was discovered by Dr. Zoidberg (an understudy of the world renowned Professor Farnsworth) of the Mustard Clinic Center for Innovation.  His experiments included baby Lima beans shown here:

And a combination of Dark Belgian chocolates shown here:

This combination was then mixed with secret amount of Vanilla Coke to produce a somewhat appetizing, albeit Irish looking, chocolate:

“It’s good cholesterol, but it spreads like bad cholesterol.” said Dr. Zoidberg when asked about the nutritional value of his new cure.  When asked about the ethics of using baby Lima beans he stated “The hell with your spoiled baby. I need those shoes.”

Dr. Zoidberg has come under considerable criticism before.  In 1947 he offended then President Harry Truman by forcing the President to choke on his gas bladder.  This incident required Zoidberg to go without funding for many years.  He was brought back into the graces of the medical community when he was given a large grant ($500 and a lifetime supply of dog food) to continue his research.

We thank Dr. Zoidberg, Professor Farnsworth, and the Mustard Clinic Center for Innovation for making this cure for herpes and syphilis.  The itching they prevent is priceless.

For a full account of the science behind this incredible discovery, please read the full article:


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