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Things for Grown-ups to Remember

Posted Nov 23 2011 12:30pm

Children, tweens and teens have capacities to see the ridiculous and the cruel that we have lost as grown-ups.  It is sad, as the world would certainly be a better place if we could stay in touch with sympathetic and empathetic feelings as easily as kids do.  They simply can’t help it.  It is part of them to ‘smell a rat’ and to see the truth in any situation.  They usually know if someone is lying.  They sense when someone is being put down unfairly.  That’s often why they can get so hurt or upset if a teacher yells at someone. They know that teasing is not funny or fun.  They sense when someone is hurting.  They know who really loves them.

I could go on and on as a psychologist and an educator about this subject.  However, the most important thing I can teach you as a parent or a teacher or a relative or friend of a child, is to be aware that their sensory apparatus is often much more accurate than yours.  You may be sick of that whiny puppy.  Your niece knows that her older brother has been teasing the puppy and the puppy doesn’t like it.  You may think that your niece’s parents squabble too much.  Your niece may be sick at heart that Daddy puts down Mommy when it isn’t always fair.  You may dismiss your son’s concerns about his teacher who he claims yells too much, as just his way of trying to not stay on top of his homework.  He may realize that she tends to yell at 3 particular children too much and too publicly and that those kids are identified because of her focus on them as the ‘bad’ kids in class.  You may think that your four year old is driving you mad with questions and you can’t wait until she is older and asks less.  You may not understand how pressing it is for her to get answers and better understand this mad, confusing universe that she has just been put into four years ago!

And so the list could go on and on.

My hope is that you will take a moment to think about the beauty of what I am sharing.  Our little ones have wisdom and a capacity for knowing what is right that we have often let go of, or covered over with the stress and strain of being a Grown-up.  Let them help you relax and see the world again from their perspective!  You will laugh and you may cry at times.  But you will become a kinder person and you will more often be helpful, and on target with a situation, as you see The Truth!

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