My husband is more a "thing" person than a "people" person I believe. He doesn't believe in wasting time on unproductive activities. I think he sees my lifestyle as not purpose driven. But I enjoy what I do and want acceptance from him. I read a lot, mainly non-fiction books, and I am active on the net. But I seem to get on his nerves.
As a retried military man myself, I recommend you two find something you both like to do together. My wife also spends a lot of time with the internet and her books.... and I would like her to spend more time with me but she does not make the time or have the energy. Luckly, We do have our long walks together, have a nice meal out, and we like to plan and get ready for parties. I would like for her to be more active and do yoga with me and go on boy scout outings with our son and I but I can only take what I can get. So I say if you want to keep him, do something with him, find common ground and get up and get going.
You have a choice be grateful for what you have or be bitter for what you don't.