My mind was bound by shackles and I could not see what was happening in the natural realm of my life. All I could see was my current situation. My brokenness was so extreme, that I could not see the hand of God moving to turn the situation around. It wasn't until I made the decision to forgive that I opened the door and gave God permission to heal me. God is such a gentlemen. He will not force himself upon on us. He says in his word, "Here I am! I am stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me" (Revelation 3:20 NIV). When God came in, he healed my every wound and put together the pieces of my broken heart. He dried away all my tears and put a new song in my heart. O' what a change that has come over me. I can shout it from the mountaintops, I am healed in Jesus name.
To arrive at this point, God would drop nuggets of wisdom into my spirit. It was revelations of his word that made me whole and helped me to further understand the purpose he had for my life. " For I know the plans that I havefor you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future" (Jeremiah 29:11, NIV).
Driving home one day, the Spirit of God spoke into my spirit that I had a "dead situation". Initially I did not understand, but then the Spirit of God reminded me about the story of Mary, Martha and their brother Lazarus. Immediately, I knew it was from God. The dead situation was my marriage. Even though I had been praying for months and months, God was letting me know, it was dead. There was nothing that I could humanly do to resurrect it. As I stayed in the Spirit, I heard, "if you just believe". It was a simple, but profound statement. It was also strange. I thought if my situation was dead, what am I believing for?
"The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord and he delights in his way" (Psalms 37:23). God was setting my situation up in order that he would get the glory. What God was getting ready to do, no man could take credit for it. God is about to do the same for you, woman of God. Your situation in the natural is dead without a heartbeat or pulse. But God has you on his mind. He is getting ready to resurrect your situation in just a few days. The question is do you believe God today? I understand your faith is on life support and you are ready to pull the plug. Let me remind you that God specializes in things that seem impossible. Is your situation impossible? Turn it over to God. He will fix it. "God is able to do exceedingly abundantly beyond all that we can ask or think according to the power that worketh in us" (Ephesians 3:20 KJV).
Even though, God tarried for four years to heal me from my pain. He designed it to be so. My faith at that particular time had to grow, because of who God had already called me to be. The purpose He had already spoke over me before the foundations of the world required the kind of faith, that I did not posses. God was using my situation to increase my faith. God knows all things. "God knows when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts a far off" (Psalms 139:2 NIV). God already knew that he would heal me. Would I trust him enough to believe that he would. Do you trust God today?
As women, we have to keep our faith alive and strong by staying plugged into the power source of Jesus Christ. The devil will try to make you give up on God. He did with me. I admonish you today to press your way through and seek God daily with your heart. "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything through prayer and supplication make your request known to God" (Philippians 4:6 KJV).
Do not listen to the enemy of this world who does not desire for you to be healed and set free. Spend time with God and in his presence. I know personally that as a woman you are busy into a daily routine of cooking, cleaning, homework with the kids and etc. You may forget to read your Bible or fall asleep before praying. That is where the enemy of this world wants you to be. The enemy knows that when you spend time in God's presence, you will begin to discern the difference between God's voice and the enemy's.
Like Mary and Martha in the biblical account, you are probably thinking it is too late. I thought it was too late and had given up. I repeated the words of those two sisters, "Lord if only you had been here." God knows what He is doing. If you could see past the tears and understand that God has a purpose for your pain. If you would just believe, woman of God. He will drop nuggets of revelations into your spirit, as He did with me. He will not come when you want Him, but He will be on time. Also, when God speaks to you it may not be what you want to hear, but just believe. Remember the story of Lazarus. It took the supernatural of God to intervene. Will you believe that God has a greater purpose for the pain that you are experiencing now?. Will you trust that God desires to heal you everywhere you hurt? If you just believe, than you too can be healed without scars in Jesus name.