I have a great friend who can talk the hind leg of a donkey. I have known him forever and he's lovely. He rattles on all day about his business, skiing and what his wife and duaghter are up to. In fact he talks about them more than anything else. Yet he claims they are not very important and he could easily live a single life again.
Well I disagree. You see we all give away what we are actually paying attention to by what comes out of our mouths. You know how when you've just met a new friend and suddenly their name is in every second sentence that you speak. Or you discover a new interesting fact and it seems to be relevant to almost everything that is going on around you.
Well, what we are paying attention to governs how we direct our lives. Thats why its better to listen to what a person talks about than to what they tell you is important. Its all subconscious rather than in our conscious awareness. So what they tell you may be what they THINK is important whereas what they talk when they are NOT thinking about what is important is more likely to be what is really important to them.
What are you talking about today? What do you think is important to you? Now replay your last few conversations and really answer the question.