* Welcome to the NEW Ask Coach Vanessa column. Here to help you think in the box, outside the box, around the
box, and without a box. You will get clarity, resources, a plan of
action, and plain old feel better. Got a question or a scenario that
you'd like
some FREE coaching on? Click 'Email Me" on your left. *
Hi Vanessa,
I am married and have three young children ages 6,
4, and 2. I also invented a product and am running my business out of
the home. I am constantly being torn in every direction----I just want
balance not perfection.
Josephine Geraci
Founder & President
My Mom Knows Best, Inc. ***
Hi Josephine,
Ah, beyond the full plate, you've got all five courses going at once! You are on the right track with letting go of
perfection. The next step:
let go of balance. I can hear you right now, "But, that's what I want, that's why I'm writing you, coach lady." I can't help you attain what doesn't exist.
Balance is a myth. There's always going to be some part of life that has more emphasis than others. The real issue at hand is that you feel torn in different directions and you'd like not to be.
The easiest way to get there from here is to start with giving yourself some props, a pat on the back, a treat, some uber acknowledgment. In order to actually appreciate your circumstances, take a step back from them, and see all that you are doing from a position of strength.
You are married. That in itself is an investment and accomplishment. Plus 3 children. An invention (you creative diva). And your own business. That tells me you are a go getter, someone actively interested in contributing and making a difference, a powerful woman.
Now, let's take a look at what you said "I am constantly being torn in every direction."
While I don't doubt that you feel this way, the statement itself is not true. Overemphasizing the issue only keeps you in a tailspin. Let's break it down. Being constantly torn in every direction is not possible. You wouldn't get anything done, at all, ever. If you keep repeating this to yourself and others, it only reinforces the feeling of torn and takes you further away from "balance".
The truth is you want the energy and groundedness to give your attention to the various aspects of your life. And you want to do so in a way that you are effective and supported.
How does this happen? By assessing what's currently taking place on a daily basis. Look at what you are doing, what would be ideal, and what would be realistic. It's time to objectively evaluate what's actually happening and decide to make some changes so your life works more smoothly.
Here are 3 suggestions to start with:
- As soon as you start to feel torn, stop what you are doing, even if just for a moment. If you can't physically stop, think "stop." This will literally stop the spin so you can go back to your life from a new starting place.
- When you feel a buildup of energy - from feeling, thinking, or doing - shake it off. Do a little shimmy. Bounce up and down. Then drink water. The movement stimulates the lymph (our toxic drain system) and the water flushes the toxins out of your system.
- Keep track of your time and activities. Take on a new identity as your own assistant. Add 2 minutes of you time at various spots throughout the day.
Thanks for writing in. Keep in touch and let us know how it goes.
* Welcome to the NEW Ask Coach Vanessa column. Here to help you think in the box, outside the box, around the box, and without a box. You will get clarity, resources, a plan of action, and plain old feel better. Got a question or a scenario that you'd like some FREE coaching on? Click 'Email Me" on your left. *
***
Hi Josephine,
Ah, beyond the full plate, you've got all five courses going at once! You are on the right track with letting go of perfection. The next step: let go of balance. I can hear you right now, "But, that's what I want, that's why I'm writing you, coach lady." I can't help you attain what doesn't exist.
Balance is a myth.
There's always going to be some part of life that has more emphasis than others. The real issue at hand is that you feel torn in different directions and you'd like not to be.
The easiest way to get there from here is to start with giving yourself some props, a pat on the back, a treat, some uber acknowledgment. In order to actually appreciate your circumstances, take a step back from them, and see all that you are doing from a position of strength.
You are married. That in itself is an investment and accomplishment. Plus 3 children. An invention (you creative diva). And your own business. That tells me you are a go getter, someone actively interested in contributing and making a difference, a powerful woman.
Now, let's take a look at what you said "I am constantly being torn in every direction."
While I don't doubt that you feel this way, the statement itself is not true. Overemphasizing the issue only keeps you in a tailspin. Let's break it down. Being constantly torn in every direction is not possible. You wouldn't get anything done, at all, ever. If you keep repeating this to yourself and others, it only reinforces the feeling of torn and takes you further away from "balance".
The truth is you want the energy and groundedness to give your attention to the various aspects of your life. And you want to do so in a way that you are effective and supported.
How does this happen? By assessing what's currently taking place on a daily basis. Look at what you are doing, what would be ideal, and what would be realistic. It's time to objectively evaluate what's actually happening and decide to make some changes so your life works more smoothly.
Here are 3 suggestions to start with:
Thanks for writing in. Keep in touch and let us know how it goes.