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Useless Plastic Crap Item of December

Posted Jun 06 2009 12:04am

It’s the middle of the month and time to highlight another piece of useless plastic crap. Last month it was the plastic turkey wishbone. I have been watching for a good December nominee and thought I had found one when I saw a pair of plastic bull testicles dangling under a pickup truck. They seem pretty useless to me, but my husband pointed out that there are not that many plastic bull testicles out there on the highways. Plus, anyone who puts them on their vehicle is probably not reading my blog.

Another possibility was a plastic toy McDonald’s drive through. This is wrong for so many reasons, but I have decided not to feature any toys. There are so many plastic toys out there that I could never decide on one. The last time I walked through the toy aisle at Walmart, the plastic smell emanating from the toys was disgusting.

This month’s highlighted item is the plastic banana slicer. It meets all of my criteria: 1. If removed from the face of the earth, there would be no negative effects. In fact the earth would benefit; 2. There is no logical reason for its existence; 3. It can easily be replaced with eco-friendly, simpler means.

“It makes fast work of cutting firm bananas into perfect pieces.” Is your life so busy that you can’t take the extra 5 seconds to cut a banana into pieces with a knife? Are you so anal that your banana pieces must be perfect? If you watch the Food Network, you will never see a chef using such specialized utensils. They simply use a good knife and a cutting board. No plastic utensils needed. One kitchen utensil site also featured a plastic banana split banana peeler and a plastic plantain peeler. These items are going to be around forever. Think about that you plastic crap manufacturers. Maybe next month I will actually feature plastic crap. I have seen it.
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