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It’s More Watery Than Water

Posted Sep 24 2008 11:35am

On a recent journey through Wal*targ the other day, while passing rows of cheap plastic crap from Asian netherworlds, I came across an aisle marker that read “Enhanced Water”.  What the heck?  Isn’t every drinkable liquid simply enhanced water?  Orange juice is water enhanced by oranges.  Coffee is water enhanced by coffee grounds.  Mud is water enhanced by dirt.  Eye of the beholder, no?

But that lead me to think about these so called energy drinks.  Red Bull, Rockstar, Monster, whatever.   People are going crazy for this enhanced sugar and caffeine water.  Researchers have actually called them a “gateway drug” due to the high caffeine content.  Gateway drug! 

Back up a smidge Chicken Little.  Whether or not these drinks enhance any performance is besides the point…but calling the amount of caffeine in these drinks a gateway drug, you’d better stick a warning sign up on all the Starbucks in town as well.  Most of these drinks are similar in caffeine content to your decaf mocha crapochino with lite whip.  Is that cup of brewed enhanced sugar and caffeine water a gateway drug too?

I’m not condoning over use of caffeine or sugar but talk about the pot calling the kettle black.  Don’t lose your heads over this one.  What’s the take home point? If you don’t want your kids to down shots of double espresso, you should probably limit their intake of other enhanced waters as well.

Have an opinion on this?  I’d love to hear it.

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