What is she writing now I hear ye shriek! I have been watching this show, initially the first time I saw it, I thought aaargh Hollywood crud to the extreme. Then I got really bored and needed a distraction and a friend had given me a couple of seasons to watch. I became engrossed why?
Not the seedy PORN element but the reality of so many aspects on how men and women are behaving today and the reason I am put off dating. When my marriage broke up oh so many years ago, I was vulnerable. I didn't realise how vulnerable I was until some real creeps wanted to leech of my misfortune and insecurities.
One of the most common things I came across were men in their 30's and early 40's. They would pretend they were over their relationships or looking for a genuine relationship. Reality they were trying to bonk their way through as many women as they could to get over their last relationship. Or they would be dating women while sleeping with their ex. Or both. This program reinforced my experiences of many men who act in such a deplorable way. Why cant men be honest with a woman and say "I'm not over my ex" or "I'm only wanting sex and nothing else because I really want my ex back", they wouldn't say that though because the majority of sane women would run not wanting to be used.
Like the character David Duchovney depicts he shags his way around the town, still expecting his ex partner to embrace and go back to him lovingly, my ex did that also. I believe if you really do want your ex back and are in love and not just want a possession, then the thought of shagging someone else would not cross your mind!! Then he and the other characters would lie through their teeth. This recent discovery after a survey was done in the U.K is subjective, but some form of proof men lie more than women. That's not rocket science.
Another thing I don't understand is when people get all septic and spiteful when someone they are dating tells them they don't love them. You cannot make someone love you and if I ever dated in the past and that was said I would respectfully walk. Some women don't give up and go all crazy on it, chasing the guy, getting revenge like the 16 year old character played in Californication. To me self respect and dignity is more important, let it go, he doesn't love you! However it is not o.k for someone to pretend they love another, but in fact only want a shag buddy or to use them while they get over an ex.
If a women has been lied to in such a way, then she has every reason to get all septic and crazy over it. Because she has been lied to, used and humiliated. Californication portrays a bunch of very sad women who think they are only valued as a shag/bonk whatever. They have obviously had so many bad experiences with men that they have given up and just play the game, instead of pursuing a loving , respectful relationship..
What gets me the most are mind games, either they don't want the woman they are using to leave them, so they lie some more, until they get their ex back, or find a better substitute. Also when they are caught out, they swing it back around and make out you have the issue and are causing problems. When all they had to do was to be honest and tell the truth. The thing is, these guys are saving money from not using prostitutes, why should they when there is an abundance of vulnerable women to use and manipulate. How to know your being used.
He spends more time at his ex house than at yours. He speaks of his ex more than he does about anything else He always is txting his ex He compares you to his ex He persistently seeks revenge Your more of a convenience than a partner He hides you when his ex turns up (he is trying to still look faithful and available for her) Or the flip side, he tries to make her jealous, by always taking you to events she is at.
If a dude is serious about getting back with his ex he will do none of the above, stay faithful and work on any issues that caused them to break up.
My final pet peeve are men who come from countries who have arranged marriages set up in their own countries, yet they use young Western Women as objects of desire. They pretend they love them and have a future together, says he is going home for a holiday and arrives back with his new wife. She was nothing more than a piece of meat and entertainment. No wonder why our young women go off the rails, they are being used deplorably. Damn. Thank God I have my cats,they are loyal :) Sphere: Related Content