Back to the bowels. Bowel Obstruction continuation. Before I had my C.V.P line changed I had a couple of days previously had a c.t. scan done due to the fact I couldn't move. Yes because of the pain, and want to vomit. I was returned to my room, to later be faced by my consultant later that evening. The nurse had been in and changed my Diet schedule to nil by mouth. My consultant ( The surgeon) was angry with the nurse for doing this. I asked my Consultant what was wrong with me? Her reply was to just walk out the door. She did come back to tell me my bladder was over filled, and she had to wash it out and drain it. She mentioned I still had an illeus and it was o.k to eat. W.T.F? My stomach was grossly distended I was experiencing fart smelling burps, and it felt like vomit had taken up permanent residence in my oesophagus. What the c.t had actually shown was a mechanical bowel obstruction, but I found this out later. I felt as though I was being tortured. That no one was listening to me. This feeling continued right until the very end of that stay. Majority of the nurses were very kind and understanding. they did an amazing job considering they were understaffed on that ward. I had been feeling this way for nearly a week, when would it end. It did end eventually. After my C.V.P line placement and my return to smoking, I tried to think positively. I went outside and off the ward as much as I could. I prayed to be at home with my kids almost daily. Two weeks was what I had been told for the average length of stay for this operation. So my goal was for That two week mark. I tried my hardest to not use the P.C.A. One reason being I was trying to still move the rocks in my bowels. The second was you can go home on a P.C.A. Considering I had just had major, major surgery and I was regaining strength in my paralysed leg, as well as putting up with an untreated bowel obstruction, my goal was unrealistic. But I had to have some hope. The day finally came when my Consultant admitted I had a Bowel Obstruction. She said I was to have surgery the following day. I received this news just after I had been chatting with he anaesthetist about going home the next day, and stopping the P.C.A. He said it would take a few days. My kids were up visiting when The Consultant came into tell me that no I couldn't go home I was to have surgery for my Bowel Obstruction. I cried, she sent the rest of he team out. She left, and my sons came in. I had to tell them mummy wasn't coming home yet and why. They weren't impressed. My sons were 16 and 14 years old. My daughter was only 9. I had to yet tell her. I bargained with the nurses to take me out of the room I was in and place me on the ward. That room represented to me nothing but negative experiences,and isolation I needed to see some people to survive this. My friends and family were great. My friend Fi visited often in spite of her heavy schedule. But everyone pulled together to look after the kids. I had no partner, so trying to arrange he kids from hospital wasn't always easy. My ex husband looked after my daughter the whole time, him being a Doctor he explained things to her, and lessened the load. The surgery was to be the next day, I was supposed to be the last on the list. But just before 1.30 p.m on the day of t he surgery I was told I was going to theatre in the next 20 minutes. Damn no I wasn't ready. All through the past week I thought many times over that I was going to die. I was so scared. I wanted to watch my kids grow up. So on the way to theatre I had accepted that If this was my time then it was to be. I talked to my friend Laila in my head. She had died a tragic death through suicide the year before. I had also unfortunately seen her hanging in the tree. She left behind a young daughter. Laila wasn't yet 21 when she died. She was like a young sister to me. I had helped out young people on and off for years. Laila was one of them. I told her that If I died I knew she would be there. If I saw her I would kick her ass. I had missed her terribly. Her tribute video can be seen on my YouTube page KDFB35. So I gave myself some comfort and faced the anaesthetic room again. This time alone. I wasn't allowed a spinal this time. Considering they said the paralysis was due to the drainage tube, a spinal should not have been the issue. But hey remember I was actually paralysed before my first surgery even started, go figure.:) So I was knocked out, I had agreed to the nasal gastric tube, as I was under anaesthetic. I wanted that vile, putrid smelling stuff out of me anyway, without having to throw it up! The next thing I recall is waking up hours later screaming in pain. But that's for another day folks.