Hi Paulette, thnnx for bein my friend.  Sounds like you've had some battles there too. And I wish I had a magic potion to make it all go away. But thats not reality. i've been put in charge of watching My wife die an inch at a time here now for long spell from cancer.  And some of those days are real tough to deal with. I find myself very angry at God at times as I look for someone to blame.  But even in my anger I have to admit that he's blessed me many times and must have perpose in this as well.   As a Christian, I know the power in prayer. And I lift you all up before the Lord asking that He show you His perpose and begin to intervene in your struggle.   Gods Very best   AL